Hiding in Plain Sight.

I wish that without me, your heart would break.

Everyone has their own thoughts when they wake up.
Mines, I think, "S**t. Oh, why today.. Hmm, do I see him today?"
I lay there in bed, thinking how monotonous the day will be.
School, therapy, home, chores, sleep.
Then the next day is the same thing.
You won't make a difference in my life, you refuse to.

In my mind, you're afraid to make a difference in my life.
You're the lion in the jungle, powerful, yet frail.
& I am the gazelle, free to run & play, but you see me as a lower class; a Prey.
But why would you see me as prey?

Are you weak, envious that maybe I am stronger than you?
Are you afraid of my playful & free sense?
Do you even fear me?

Well, to be honest, I'm scared of you too.
I'm scared of your glory, your power, your experienced past.
You know what to do, & when to do it.
I don't.
I fear your mysterious beauty.

You make me cower in grave fear that you may just grab my heart,
Drop it on the dirty floor,
Wave at me & walk away as if nothing happened.
I don't want that happening to me.
I'm afraid.

If you were to, oh, say, prove to me that my "theory" is completely wrong,
I wouldn't believe in that stupid theory.
I'd believe in you.
I'd believe in what you think of me.
I'd believe in what you think I can do.

I'd believe.
I'd finally believe.
I wouldn't wake up wondering -- or doubting -- if I see you that day,
I'd wake up & believe you'd call me & let me know if you're gonna be there or not.



But, you haven't yet, so I'm still trapped in a paranoid state of mind.
Hoping that whatever my mind tells me is absurdly wrong.
& maybe, just maybe my heart will win this debate.

I'll just be there in school.
Standing by the wall, hiding in plain sight.
Wishing you don't see me so that I don't have to suffer.
When you do, my heart sinks down to my barely stable stomach,
& I look away as if I don't know who the hell you are.

You'll come over to me as if you're bound to murder me, with every ounce of love you have.
& I'll just stand there & smile, my mind blank, my cheeks blushing.
You know, It's so obvious that I'm constantly thinking about you.
But I try hard to hide it.
Harder than I've ever tried to do anything.
Besides have you fall for me the same way I fell for you.

Author's Note

I dunno, at first it was good, then I started ramblin about a beaner.
That's what I get for letting my heart win, huh?

Reviews

[F. Nazarov]

I see.
I don't think he's scared though.
You dramatic lady =]=]=].

This is not bad. I thought it was very honest! I know I have woke up a few days thinking like that. Great work!