I Am This Bullet

A second approach to my war piece.

I am this bullet, I am this sand
the searing heat of an Eastern sun
warming my eyes that glare at this man
wild hair pulling on the wind, to retreat
larger and larger, he appears to me
one arm clutching his rifle, the other
dragging his reluctant body forward
focusing on his gaze, he's coming
my thoughts turn to the tempting trigger
with my finger lost in the images of his loved ones
the glowing statue of his pregnant wife
joined by the young daughter, yet to speak
their arms intertwined in my mind's mirage
realising as I do, this man is just as I
a helpless pawn on a tyrants chessboard
sent as a sacrifice with no reason or reward
a twist of my head reveals my own men
my friends, brothers, whose families I know
this sudden dilemma strikes my throbbing skull
do I murder this innocent man, or
have the lost souls haunt me forever
like the machine I've become, I reactivate
I was the bullet that killed this man.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

This is tragic, not in its writing which is wonderful, but, in its theme .. war is Man's disgrace. And, as you say ' this man is just as I a helpless pawn on a tyrants chessboard ' .. another human being with people waiting for him to go home .. or not. Then, you have your comrades .. your brothers, what can you do .. the choice is horrific, horrific.

Leave you poem as it is .. it's superb ..

[Tommy]

War is not peaceful, and I hope I am never put in this situation. Many have fought and are fighting this battle; including my father, who fought in Vietnam. He always says, "The old men who start the wars, are who should be fighting them, but instead they send out young men who haven't had a chance to live, to die for their causes." I pray for the peace mind for all the men who have felt this pain, and thank you for giving insight to horrible realities of war. I would not change a thing.
RLG,
Tommy

[Jennifer Marie Theresa ..]

It reminds me about the choices a soldier has to make on the battlefield. Both men are subjected to fight for their country, yet all the emotions that run through their mind make it a difficult task. Both hold lives and families yet they are stuck inside this game. I love it, its brilliant. It does not need any editing.

[cest la vie]

not sure what edits you need/want to do, but I think it is fine as is..
what a great use of a metaphor-the man is the bullet which ultimately ends anothers life..
great writing Poet Brit!!

[messydaisy]

I like the phrase "tyrant's chessboard." It provokes an image and a feeling for the poem. Great imagery.

[deeps]

I like this, i found it kind of sad really. Feelings are very well expressed. This is also very well written as well.