CROSSROADS

CROSSROADS

 

Psalm 124: 1-8

 

1 If it had not been the Lord who was on our side, now may Israel say;

2 If it had not been the Lord who was on our side, when men rose up against us:

3 Then they had swallowed us up quick, when their wrath was kindled against us:

4 Then the waters had overwhelmed us, the stream had gone over our soul:

5 Then the proud waters had gone over our soul.

6 Blessed be the Lord, who hath not given us as a prey to their teeth.

7 Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped.

8 Our help is in the name of the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

 

When the stomach is growling, the vision turns blurry, and the body is about to collapse, a bowl of porridge is more precious than a birthright or a title of land. This was true in the lives of the patriarchs in the Old Testament book in the Bible.  It was famine in the land that made the patriarchs: Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob left the land of Canaan, the Promised Land. Also, it was a grumpy tummy that urged Isau to give up his birthright to his younger twin Jacob. This journey of temptation is common to all of us. Everyone experienced, if not yet, will experience some crossroads in life. The Oxford English Dictionary explained that it’s a point at which a crucial decision must be made that will have far-reaching consequences. If not because of the faithfulness of God, the Promised Land could have been forfeited for good when the patriarchs made the wrong choices when they faced their crossroads. But praise God for He is always true to His word, whatever He speaks, He does. He fulfils His plan and purpose in every individual for His very own pleasure. It’s not about man’s faithfulness but His. He is a faithful Father! Though His children make mistakes, He understands each of their frames, for His understanding is infinite as the book of Psalm recorded. How about Isau? He lost his birthright and it wasn’t restored to him. Should we say that God played favouritism? Of course not! Every wrong choice a person made, whether it’s done in willful disobedience or out of ignorance, innocence or the frailty of man, God knows all the reasons behind; all motives or intentions cannot escape from God’s righteous judgment. I’m sure that God’s responses to man’s mistakes shall never put His attributes into compromise. He knows what He is doing. He understands why he does what He does, for He is the sovereign and all-knowing God.

Just like the patriarchs, at some point in our lives, our family experienced these crossroads: whether to be silent or to speak up, to keep or to let go; to stay or to run away; to offer or to hold back. It was when the properties of my father’s family in Bukidnon and Cebu City were at stake for not paying the tax for more than two decades. Since my grandfather died, the tax was forgotten intentionally. Not that they can’t afford but everyone was expecting that whoever benefited the house should take responsibility to pay for the tax, but those who dwelt thought it unfair, and sadly everyone thought the same thing according to their own calculation. It’s been two years since my father died when his siblings resorted to selling the property in Bukidnon, where we lived since I was elementary, to solve the problem of the property in Cebu City. When my mother found it out, she refused to include our share, because that property has a sentimental value to her, because it was the property of her father first before it became theirs; She and her siblings  grew up in that land and in that house. The decision of my father’s siblings was fixed. The voice of my mom was questioned because it’s not a conjugal property but an inheritance in which she is not part of; she’s just a wife not a sister. Since our father is already dead, every one of us will just wait for their mercy, one of the siblings said. So, my mother decided to keep quiet with them but not with the lawyer and the buyer. She consulted and asked for advice from a lawyer who happened to be the close friend of our eldest, so the consultation was given for free. The lawyer gave her an assurance that as a wife to their dead brother, she has the right to fight in behalf of the children of the deceased.  The buyer came to Cebu for the deed of sale to be signed. The good thing was, the very first person who met him at the gate was my mother. He was smiling at my mom and told her about the papers that must be signed, so my mother asked if she could see it, out of his innocence about the plan of my relatives, he allowed. Lo and behold, when my mother saw the deed of sale, the name of my father was nowhere to be found, also the name of my other uncle who died first before my father. So my mother calmly looked at the eyes of the buyer, and said, “I’m sorry, this is wrong. If you will not include the names of those who died, it’s equal to nothing. You have not bought anything.” The buyer was teary-eyed and said, “Kit, I don’t know that much about legal matters, I’m just following what they said. I’m sorry about it.”  Then one of my aunts arrived and overheard about the paper’s discrepancy. She took the papers from the buyer, and then faced my mom and said, “Kit, I’m really sorry for this. It wasn’t my idea. I thought they will not really do it, but they did.”  My mother believed on her because she’s her closest sister in law. If my mother is not a Christian, she could have made it a very big issue, but she didn’t, she did not even confront any of her in laws. The buyer went home and had the papers changed. Though, majority of the property was sold but not our share and my uncle’s. That’s why, if we will go home in Bukidnon, we still have a house to stay. It may not be big and elegant, but what’s more important is, it satisfies the value of my mom’s sentiment.

       After this event, as if nothing happened. My mother still talked to her in laws. By the grace of God, we still managed to show our respect to them, even to those who tried to manipulate everything. Did it happen that simple? Absolutely not! It took us to hear constant reminder about God’s will, God’s love, God’s forgiveness, God’s mercy and grace, and above all, God’s faithfulness and goodness. If not because of the LORD who faithfully works in our hearts, we could have forgotten that they're our relatives. We could have closed our door when life’s circumstances turned upside down.

       Please don’t get me wrong! I am not writing this to elevate myself by shaming those who failed us. Past is past! And things are written for learning, not to put down or embarrass anyone. We all fail, we all commit mistakes, but we can spare others from doing the same mistakes by our written and shared testimonies. What I want to emphasize to the readers is, we can only experience God’s greatness and goodness if we allow Him to act on our behalf instead of fighting for ourselves. And the only way so that the LORD will move for us is when we reckon in our heart and mind not to hold grudges or bitterness to anyone. We have to keep our heart pure before God by asking His grace to deepen and widen our understanding to those who failed us, even to our very own selves. For if not, the LORD shall not fight for us against others, not until  He wins us; until we surrender our own reasoning, will and purpose to Him. That’s why when we pray, instead of praying for others to change, we ask the LORD to change us first.

     If you find yourself facing some crossroads this very day, and confusion is all you feel and see, instead of looking to the left or to the right, thinking to step back or move forward, just stop, and look up! Don’t move until you clearly hear the LORD. And once you hear Him speak, keep looking up! Don’t listen to the right nor to the left. Just keep on moving forward!