New Dawn Fades- Prologue

Simply read and provide feedback

I've learned a lot since my time investigating the tragedy at Woodridge Circle. The world we inhabit is fruitful, prosperous. We live, collectively, in a hive of frenetic chaos. Humans are not born with choice; we are not born out of love, but of necessity. In my country, the citizenry fancies itself as being endowed with with freedom at birth. We are not born grasping an empty slate, but we are more often thrust into the world and swaddled in blankets of illusion. The child is nurtured in his years of blindness, and his mother’s tender touch placates his cries, but the plea, that primal scorching screech, never leaves the heart. The maternal warmth of youth molds not diamonds, but soldiers. Love is a shield, a gun, and, quite often, a bullet. We’re fluid, we’re insomniacs who sleep gently, we’re illusory. Necessity can be the only truth I understand, which means I don’t comprehend it at all. Every minuscule movement I make, the feedback inhibition of my enzymes, the catabolic implosion of molecules in my body, the contraction of my diaphragm, this word, this phrase, this fleeting point, this collision, this leviathan of despair, is necessary. I’m haunted by this revelation of necessity, because conflict is a function of need. Blood is, to humanity, as vital as water. I promised to never lose my faith in man, but now faith is only believing in something when you know damn well it isn't true.   

Author's Note

Be completely honest, analyze, criticize, destroy, love, mock, interpret

Reviews

[The Nameless]

What you say is completely true, and the choice of words and descriptions are great!

I think the first line might be a bit confusing, considering that you don't mention Woodridge Circle, or its tragedy, again during the course of the prologue.
Perhaps you should either take it out, or tell more of how Woodridge Circle has to do with what you are saying.

For the structure, try and separate them more into paragraphs. You could just skip to the next line, you don't have to leave an empty line.
Also, try to break up your sentences slightly, as some of them are a bit too long.
Especially "Every miniscule movement I make...is necessity."

Overall, I can't really judge, as I don't know what the story is. It says this is a prologue, so I assume you are speaking of the lesson you have learnt before you start telling the story, or you speak of you feelings you had then, which would change during the course of the story itself.

For further advice, you can try to simplify this prologue a little bit, as some people might not understand what you are trying to say.

But good luck with your story, please continue writing!
I'm sure it will be a good one!