Just you

Just you

A Poem by Becky

You sow your mouth shut

So no one can hear

You Rip your eyes out

So no one can see

See through your eyes which

Once blinded others

See through the hazel spheres

That once meant some thing to another

But no matter but you gain

Or what you loose

You will always be the same

Just You

 

© 2009 Becky


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Reviews

That was a bit strange but dreamy and i loved it..
Mouths shut so no one could hear..eyes closed so no one could see through
Those eyes once used to shine bright and blind others
Those eyes meant a lot to some another
Win or lose it will always be you
lovely write..

Posted 15 Years Ago


Great imagery-
to be critical, you need a good break up of your lines and stanzas, to give the piece some kind of rhythm, and "sow" should be "sew". I also cannot tell if the "R"ip was capitalized on purpose. I loved how it sounded like a voodoo doll being torn to pieces.

Posted 15 Years Ago



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Added on June 30, 2009

Author

Becky
Becky

East Haddam, CT



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