Pressure

A poem written when I was struggling with everything.

 

Forever building

Slow and steady

Until the burden becomes

Too much to bear.

 

You’ve placed me on this

Pedestal with so many

Expectations to live up to.

 

In your eyes

I could do no wrong-

I’m supposed to be this

Perfect girl who sits in her room all night

Reading her books

Surfing the Web

And writing to her heart’s content.

 

How would you react if I told you

That what you see

Is only half of my reality?

That I spend hours talking to

People from all over the country?

 

That some of the things I write about

Would not only make you cry

But also question some of my actions?

 

How badly would it wound you

If you found out that I

Not only swear

But have used 

The “F” word

Almost religiously-

Especially in my fanfic?

 

I’m not perfect

And I never claimed to be.

But in my younger years

I’ve always went above and beyond

What was expected of me.

 

Now

You expect me to still be this

Sweet, innocent little girl that I was

Back then.

 

But I’m not.

 

I’m fifteen years old-

On my way to adulthood.

And besides

Too much has happened.

 

Accept me for who I am

Flaws and all

And I’ll love you forever.

 

Continue to put all these expectations on me

And think of me as “perfect”

And I’ll resent you forever.

Author's Note

Thoughts are appriciated.