My tragic life story

Its a view into boys love life and his connection to the world. this short story shows a boys emotions in overcoming the cruel reality of finding love in world where gay people dont have a place.

My Tragic Life Story

 

Once upon a time, there was this one young boy in his early stages of becoming a man. His entire life had being spent hidden in the shadows of his own identity, in deep need to please and be accepted by others.  His loneliness and thirst for love was growing stronger each day but he had no one to go to, no one to share anything with.

His room was the only place where he could be himself. Music was like a window to that world he so long to be a part of. That world so perfect and happy but society had denied him the right to belong.

He would lock his bedroom door, turn the music up, close his eyes and dance with his soul and pretend to be happy. Hours would go by. Hours of happiness and joy but then, when the music died, the night fell and the lights were off, the loneliness, sadness and need of love would take him over again and he would cry himself to sleep night after night.

There was a time when an intruder came into his life. He was very happy because he thought that someone had finally cared for him but this was not real, this intruder only wanted self-satisfaction. This intruder only wanted to get physical and not emotional like he dreamed of and obviously, it ended shortly there after.

Home to school and back, what a life that was?

Everyday seemed worst then the one before. No one seemed to understand or even try to figure him out.

He thought he was not important

His music: his only companion.

Dance: his only passion

His self-esteem, lower than ever

He thought himself ugly, he thought himself unworthy.

He fell in love.

Unfortunately, he fell for the wrong person.

More tears came along, more rejection and fear.

Disappointment was cruel. He felt used and betrayed.

He was bound for an emotional break down.

He realized he was a giver of affection but never got any in return. The only attention and affection he ever got was at home and even then, it was not enough to make him happy.

He did not know what it was like to be shown “LOVE” or “Affection” by another guy.

That had always being dream.

But he did not know what to do.

He did not know what it was like, to hear an "I love you" from someone who actually meant it or even cared.

He did not know what it was like to be kissed or held, or to feel protected by someone.

He could not help it but to dream, sigh and  cry.

To dream of that special someone;

Someone who would rid off his loneliness

Rid off his fears, his sadness and lack of love and affection;

He was growing up.

His room, his music, and himself

That is all he had.

Many people surrounded him but no one seemed to care much.

No one cared about what really troubled him.

No one ever asked how he felt.

No one ever noticed how miserable his life was.

His “friends” or acquaintances were not there for him.

He had no one to talk to or trust

It was a NIGHTMARE.

Waking up in the mornings was not worth it anymore.

It was only another sad, lonely day.

School was getting bad with bad grades.

He had a different attitude now.

HE DIDNT CARE ANYMORE

NOTHIN MATTERED

"F**K EVERYTHING" he would say to himself

Then one day everything changed

He met someone

It was real

He couldn’t believe it

He could not help it to smile

It was the first time

He was getting messages from somebody who "actually" cared

OMG, he thought it was a dream

Then another message and a request to meet

It was just too good; he thought it had to be a mistake

He still didn’t' feel worthy of this

He still thought himself ugly

He still had fears of rejection

However, this guy liked him! He could not believe it

This guy had a special interest in him

But why?

“Why me,” he thought

This guy wanted to meet

And to be friends and maybe "more????"

He was so happy

He felt different

It was too much for his little heart

It wanted to beat its way out of his chest

Too exciting!

They met!

His life was never the same again.

That boy was me!

 

Author's Note

this story is based on real life events

Reviews

[facadeofshadows]

More than anything, I loved the rhythm of this piece � it was almost like free form poetry. I felt like I was being emotionally attacked from all angles, which is, I'm sure, exactly how you felt.

This might sound like criticism, but it isn't so please keep reading: This isn't the best piece of writing I've ever read, and I don't think it is where it would need to be to be publishable� but to me that isn't the point. The point was that you shared with us something you experienced by throwing this complete rampage of emotion at us. It was very effective. Well done.