Amnesia

My over-thought attempt at sci-fi. I still like it though despite all of its plot bugs.

 

Amnesia

            It is warm. I float weightlessly where I’m curled in my soft confinement. My eyes are unseeing in my surroundings, swathed in a suffocating darkness, but I feel safe here. The sound of my heart is the only one that accompanies me, a comforting metronome within - its unceasing pa-thump, pa-thumps a sweet lullaby as I dream on…

            It is cold. I’m blind in the hot white glare that surrounds me- my eyes sting lividly beneath my heavy lids. And then they open.

            “MARE-UHHH!”

            My eyes really snap open now, a thin line of drool drips down my arm forming a small pool at the base of my elbow from where my cheek sits in my hand. I look incoherently into Lexi’s muddy brown eyes- now rolling as I meet her gaze- her small mouth twisting in her irritation.

            “Mayra,” Lexi mutters, “class is over! Do I have to scream like a banshee every time you fall asleep? God it’s impossible to wake you.”

            “Lexi?” 

Her name feels heavy on my tongue. How long have I been asleep? I look around the empty classroom that surrounds me…did the bell really ring?

            “No, it’s Santa Clause,” she snaps, “now let’s get going or we’ll be late!”

            “Yeah, okay.”

 I follow her into the monotonous blank halls of our High school. She rattles on as we walk- the latest gossip spilling from her mouth in a rambling slew of he- saids and she- saids. I just nod subconsciously as we walk-my thoughts too heavily entwined around that dream to really listen.

What can it mean? Since the accident, I’ve had that dream every night now…but that’s not what my brain wrestles with. The stark vividness of the dream is what troubles me now. Every time the same blinding white light brings spots to my eyes even after I wake. Every time I feel that unbearable bone chilling cold- until I abruptly rouse to my teeth chattering. I walk slower now as my head fogs over with the feeling that I’m missing something. Something important. 

“Mayra? Mayra you’re spacing. Did you even hear what I just said?”

“Huh?” I shake my head, trying to unclog the cogs in my brain.

“Mayra you’re hopeless aren’t you? Every time I turn around you get that same blank look on your face. God you have me worried sometimes” Lexi’s eyebrows pull together in mock concern, sarcasm still glittering within her small eyes.

“Sorry, Lex. I just have a lot on my mind.”

 Lexi gives me a funny look and grabs my hand, pulling me along to the end of the hall.

“Anyways,” Lexi says, her voice returning to it’s excited squeal, “Like I was trying to say before you turned into a vegetable.”

She pauses for effect. Anticipation lights her eyes as she awaits my reaction.

“Todd asked me to prom!” She gushes.

I open my mouth to congratulate her, but my breath sticks in my throat as a hint of white movement catches in the corner of my eye. I turn quickly… but it is gone.

“Mayra what are you looking at? Mayra? Mayra snap out of it!”

I look around frantically. Nothing. Am I going crazy? Without warning I suddenly feel dizzy; the world spins around me faster and faster in a shapeless blur. I hear Lexi yell something incomprehensible. I feel the ground speed upward as my balance gives.

 And then everything goes black.

It is dark. So dark I know not if my eyes are opened or closed. I breathe the thick air that surrounds me. The floor I lie on is damp. I shudder as I rise from the icy concrete and try to stand. I bump my head on a low ceiling not five feet from where I lay. Panicked, I run my fingers along the slimy walls surrounding me. Closing in on me. I feel the room growing warmer as it shrinks, getting smaller and smaller. My breathing quickens, my hearts races. I suck the moist air for oxygen but all that meets my lungs in a burning dryness. I choke. I fall.

I awaken.

Mother stands over me; her head blocks out a fluorescent glow from above. My eyes squint in the glaring light as relief floods her tired features and she retreats to my side. Her cold hands cup my face.

“Oh, Honey! I’m so glad you’re alright!”

It takes me a moment to realize where I am. I look down at a pasty green hospital gown surrounded by a sea of rumpled gray blankets. A vase of pink carnations sit on the table near me- from Lexi no doubt. An IV sticks out of my arm.

“Not again,” I moan.

This was the second time this month my fainting spells have landed me here.

“Now Hon, you’ve been out a long time. We didn’t know if you were going to wake up. If your breathing hadn’t stayed normal…” Mother looks away as a hysterical note slips into her tight voice, “they would have put you on life support!”

Life support?

“How long have I been out this time?” I manage to say, my voice rough from misuse.

Mother looks at me now. Suddenly she seems about ten years older. Dark bruise-like circles float beneath her blood shot eyes. Her forehead is creased with worry lines…much deeper that I last remember.

“Honey, you’ve been asleep for twelve days.”

My throat tightens with disbelief.

“Twelve…days?” The words come out in a whisper.

Is it possible that one of my silly fainting spells has lasted twelve days?

“Did I hit my head or something?

Mother shakes her head.

“You had a bump but the doctors said that’s not what caused it. They feared you might have something far worse…but they’ve tested you for all sorts of things…cancer, diabetes, HIV and who know what else…but for all of them you’ve tested negative. You haven’t had so much as a fever since you’ve gotten here…you’ve only been asleep and no one could wake you.”

My head spins as I take in her words. Healthy people don’t just sleep for twelve days. There has to be something wrong. But what? I think back as far as I can. I can’t however, think of any reason I would be asleep for so long…except….

A single thought strikes me, ricocheting through my mind before I can blink. There is a single tear in my tidily stitched up diagnosis-the amnesia. Maybe it had something to do with this.

I still remember when I first was here a month ago, although when I woke up then I barely knew my own name. Barely.

“Honey you were in an accident” Mother had said as she reached down and brushed a lock of my dark hair from my damp brow.

“An accident?” I had no recollection of this. All I remembered was waking up…. and that strange dream…that had been the first time I’d had it.

I looked down. There were no cuts, no bruises, no bandages or broken bones on my body. I felt no pain. Just numb.

“What kind of accident?” I asked Mother.

I thought I saw something flicker across her face…a sudden tightening of her features…was it fear?

“Never mind, Hon. It was very horrific. No need to remember bad things now.” She patted the blanks around me- tucking them tightly around my neck, “but…the doctors think you may have amnesia.”

“Amnesia?” the word felt odd as I said it. Alien even.

I blinked. My head was filled with a thick haze drowning my memory of anything that happened before then…sure I knew who I was. My name was Mayra Reynolds. I knew I was seventeen. I knew the women who stood before me was Mother. Yet I had no memories. I didn’t remember what my favorite color was, or my favorite song or whether I preferred chocolate to vanilla…nothing. I didn’t remember having friends, birthdays, pains I’ve felt, and joys I’ve known. I had no recollection of my childhood… or being any other age…

My past had been erased.

“Mayra?”

My eyes snap open at Mother’s hand on my shoulder.

“Oh Mayra, don’t worry me like that!”

I ‘m about to ask what she means when I realize she thinks I might go to sleep again.

“Don’t worry, Mother. I don’t feel tired anymore,” I say, trying to reassure her although my eyes sting as I struggle to keep my heavy lids open.

“I’ll go down to the cafeteria and grab you something now that you’re up.”

Mother seems satisfied as she leaves the room.

I hear the door close softly…my eyelids seal in unison with the sharp click of the knob turning.

I wake with a start as I feel a cold hand on my face.

“Mother,” I murmur, my eyes still shut.

I hear no reply. I open my eyes and stifle a scream.

Standing over me is a figure shrouded in white. Not just any white. The sweltering white of the sun.

I can see now through my squinting eyes that the figure looks like a woman, although I can’t see her face.

            “ I haven’t much time,” she says in a whisper, “but you must know the truth.”

            “The truth?”

            Who was this ghostly figure standing by my bed?

            “Yes.”

            At this she pulls at the corner of her snowy robe…

            “Look.”

            I turn my head slightly to where she stands and gasp. Across her stomach from one side to the other is a livid scar, glowing crimson against her pallid skin.

            “Wha…what happened to you?

            She turns her hooded head towards mine.

            “Do you really not remember?”

            “No,” I whisper.

            “They must have erased your memories,” she murmurs miserably.

            “They?”

            “The makers.”

This was getting weird. Who is this ghost woman and what the hell is she talking about?

            “Do you know why I’ve been asleep for twelve days?”

            She nods.

            “Another dose.”

            “Of what?”

            She turns away from me.

            “Memory compressor,” she says her soft voice brimming with disgust, “not as much as last time. Just enough for you to forget.”

            “Forget?’

            Her covered head turns again towards me.

            “ What are you talking about?”

            The white figure bows her head. Her hands, the color of cool wax are balled into fists.

           "That couldn't be! Mother would never allow them to…" I cant even say it. It sounded so perpostrous. I     must be hallucinating. Strange.

            The pale hand beneath the robe clutches mine in an icy vice.

            “That person you call mother,” she spits “is not who you think.”

            “Wha....what do you mean?” The hand is so cold. Her grip burns.

            “She is not your mother. She is your maker. She was my maker. She is the head of the makers.”

            “The makers of what? You aren’t making any sense!”

            “An experiment”

            “ A what?”

            “An experiment to see if you could lead a human life if given the right care.”

            “What?  Human life? I am a human. What do I look like to you?” I laugh but the laugh is shaky. I try to brush it off but a deep fear clutches me. Something in her words shake me. The figure turns away from me.

             " You are not human. You're the last one, chosen to survive until you're...needed". Her voice breaks on the last word.

             “Who are you?” I demand.

            “I was what they grew me for. I was a heart, a liver, some lungs, two kidneys and a stomach, now pulsing with the blood of others.”

            I feel the blood drain from my face.

            “You were grown for your organs?”

            She nods again.

            “Like…like an animal?”

            None of this was making sense.

     She turns away from me and drops her head in despair.

 “We were,” she whispers.

She drops her hood and my breath catches in my throat as I gaze upon the face that looks at me with tear filled eyes.

The face I see is my own.