The Declamation of the Middle Class Jesus

Declamation of The Middle Class Jesus

 

Settle down " I propose a toast,

For a second leave the quiche platter

And your daddy-issues-chitter-chatter,

And listen…

Here I am;

The best thing since god and the Holy Ghost.

 

The Middle Class Jesus will now say some words for you -

Blessed are you second homes

And sacred 4 by 4s,

The Lord

Implores

You; keep looking down on polytechnics,

You unapologetic

Gracious Eurosceptics.

Blessed are the expats

Cursed are the experts

Blessed are those who eat until it literally hurts.

 

I like your doilies and your tissues…

Just not your daddy issues.

 

Blessed are your clean jokes and

The forced laughter that follows

- And that drink you swallow,

Well…

I didn’t turn water into Shloer

For you to celebrate Grammar Schools quietly -

I want you to preach

On the streets

This higher echelon of society.

 

And I tell you, my friends,

Your life in heaven depends

On us building a new Jerusalem

Round a coffee table

And signing up to this life with company pens.

 

But if you bang on about your Dad

A second more

I swear…

 

I’ll tell you what mine did to me.