I'm Alive in Your Hands (Tramp)

What of you, Tramp,
Here in old Tom’s city,
You learned to hang your
head to high society.
Like these rats and rodents
on boats and in trees,
I see scravenging for
some pain au chocolat…

 

Though you know,
I know, I wouldn’t lay
there with you.

 

What of me, then,
You see, I lifted this
head in dignity -
though I had none
to give - misgivings,
forgivings, forgetting,
and finally, the
x = y of all problems:
loving.

 

Though you know,
I know, I couldn’t die
there with you.

 

I wouldn’t try to ‘cos
it all falls, dwindling
and twisting
in the end.

 

But if you want to, friend,
The next time I see you,
I’ll hang my head to.  

Reviews

[KAREN BROWN]

I think you did a great job,I loved reading it and i appreciate you sharing it with me.

[Gray]

Your writing has a nice beat and flow. Your use of spoken sonics is very good. I enjoyed this one, particularly.

Gray

[Garrett Cook]

Thematically strong, good points made, solid rhythm. It could stand to be a little longer with slightly more imagery, however. I think fleshing out the world of poverty and grime more would be rewarding.