Who Am I Kidding?

I started writing this poem 2 months ago and finished it 11/24/2009. Probably not so good, because I usually hate not finishing a poem at once because it jambles up your original thoughts.

Who am I kidding?

I tried to move on and forget this feeling

It's only one in a million

There's only one who's supposed to give you this feeling

The feeling that they're your sun, because your universe revolves around them

Without them there is no heat or warmth

I close my eyes

Swallow my pride

And realize this truth

The truth that you're who I see in my future

No longer will this fact try and hide

No longer will I pretend

No longer am I going to act like just a friend

It's like I'm a hitch hiker and you're the car that picked me up...

I'm headed to forever with you or bust

 

Reviews

[Sarah]

hell yeaahhh dawwgggg

[Alicia™]

I love this poem, but the last 2 lines just lost me. I love the rest, though! Good job.

[Sarah]

forever or bust?? hmm i'm thinkin i pick foreve :D

[Deepshikha]

"I close my eyes/
Swallow my pride/
And realize this truth"
Those lines can apply almost to any situation you choose. But I've liked how you've applied them here. Very nice word chose. Very nice flow. Very nice overall.

[deeps]

No longer will this fact try and hide
No longer will I pretend
No longer am I going to act like just a friend
It's like I'm a hitch hiker and you're the car that picked me up...
I'm headed to forever with you or bust

I loved those lines.
This is quite the amazing write.
I like the emotion in this.
This is very well expressed and written.

[LisetteCanWrite!]

Great job.. loved this.. don't ever give up if she doesn't turn out to be the one.. lots of girls your age are looking for a great guy with such passionate talent. Fabulous work in showing of emotions.. faith and devotion. Such writing could only come from a truly deep beating heart!