Death Remembered

            The moonlight shined brighter than all the stars combined and it gave life to the graveyard close by. One by one the ghosts came out for fresh air, or so that was their excuse to be out in the world. The new ghosts seemed to be confused and distorted, yet they joined the older ghosts who were catching up on the day’s news. Kelsi, the youngest of all, was still wandering and yet to figure her place. The rest of us knew what happened to her, except for her.

            “Uh--um--where are we?” asked Kelsi looking puzzled.

            Jessica had a slight smirk on her face and responded, “well, you’re dead.”

            In disbelief, Kelsi paced back and forth, “n--no, that can’t be possible. I heard the ambulance. The--they saved me.”

            “But you’re here, so I guess they didn’t,” the sarcasm in Jessica’s voice was growing, “within time, you’ll remember.”

            “Remember what?!” asked Kelsi.

            Jessica looked deep into her eyes for a while, “your death.”

            Fear ran across Kelsi’s face, “bu--then--how did you get here?”

            Emelia, the oldest, overheard their conversation and walked up to Jessica. Grabbing her by the shoulder she joined the conversation, “yes, Jessica, why don’t we all tell the new bees our stories. You can start.”

            Jessica chuckled, “I’ll pass.”

            “I insist my dear,” replied Emelia as she gazed at Jessica.

            Now, who was Jessica to undermine Emelia, so she sighed and nodded in agreement. Glancing at the sky, Jessica seemed to be praying as if a disaster was about to occur. She looked towards the crowd of ghosts in hesitation, “it was a slow death. Something I had tried to avoid for a while, but I guess that’s how my life was planned out. I--uhh--,”

            In a calming voice Emelia says, “Jess it’s okay. Go ahead, continue.”

Their eyes met and Jessica begins to speak, “I guess you could say it all started when I was fourteen. There was a man, he was my mother’s friend, and sometimes he would come over to the house. Umm--he and my mom",”

In frustration Emelia cut her off, “dear if we are going to be stuck here like a family, we will act like a family. You don’t have to fear the past anymore.”

A tear began to form in Jessica’s eye, “okay, okay. He was my mother’s new boyfriend and she was blinded by his pathetic charm. He soon began to take an interest in me. He would drive me everywhere, even cook for me. Then he began to care too much for my appearance, and he would tell me how to dress. When I didn’t agree he’d slap me and thrown me around,” Jessica started squeezing her hands and you could notice the sorrow expand over her body, “my--my mother didn’t know, nor did I tell her. I feared his anger and I’d never put my mother at risk.”

Kelsi seemed to be confused, “but wouldn’t she stop it?! You were her little girl!”

Jessica’s face turned stiff as a rock, “yes, and that was her ‘prince charming’. I saw no point in speaking up,” Jessica shrugged her shoulders and Kelsi looked away in fear she made the memory worse, “once I turned sixteen, he--uhh--he would touch me in places I didn’t want him to and he said if I told my mother, he’d deny it. I knew she’d believe him so I didn’t even try,” Jessica pauses and looks back towards her grave, “on--umm--one afternoon I came early from school, and I was surprised to see him home already. I walked up to my room and before I could shut the door, he was already there. He just stood in the doorway and smiled. He whispered, ‘you’ve been a bad girl. It’s about time you get what you deserve.’ At that moment I just froze; I couldn’t even save myself,” no one made a sound and in the midst of the silence there were wolves heard in the background, “after that afternoon I was never the same. I was quite, and god forbid anyone tried touching me, I’d snap their neck. From that moment on, every night right when my mother would go to sleep, he’d sneak in my room and rape me.”

Emelia rubs Jessica’s shoulders in attempt to sooth the pain, “dear it’s alright now, it’s just a faded memory.”

“Ugh,” Jessica sighed, “my life was spiraling out of control. I had no friends, no boyfriend, and don’t even want to mention my grades. After two months I just couldn’t take it, so I told my mother.”

Kelsi felt relieved, “THANK GOD!”

“Ha! I wish I could thank god, but sh--she didn’t believe me,” Jessica stared into the emptiness ahead, “she called me crazy and said I was on drugs. She made excuses for that b*****d,” the air got a little chillier and if and human walked by they’d be able to feel a presence, “I tried to get help, and again she lied for him. I gave up everyone hated me because my mother would tell people I wanted her boyfriend. I was isolated from the world and the pain was unbearable; shortly after I tried to OD.”

“Such a horrible way to die Jess",”Kelsi looked away from Jessica and kneeled down by her grave.

“Haha, if only it did end like that,” Jessica hesitated to continue on, “umm… my mother had put me in a mental hospital. You know, where the crazy people go, and I was in there for a year or so. I was able to block out the memory of what had happened. Although I knew it was too soon for me to tell myself my life was better. One year and two months later, he came to visit me.

Kelsi’s eyes opened wide, “uh oh…”

“I didn’t get to know who my visitors were until I was strapped down in a seat. As my new stepfather, they saw nothing wrong with letting him visit. He smiled just like he did the first time he raped me. He--uh--he began to go over details of what he used to do to me. He called himself a ‘man’ for changing me into a ‘woman’. That b*****d was so proud and all I wanted to do was claw his eyes out,” Jessica’s rage was so massive that everything around her began to shake, “strapped down all I could do was cry. I could never stop the torture. Every day it haunted me, so I decided. I was done. Since I was a good patient, I had earned privileges. That night I begged to help in the office; told them I wanted the ‘experience’. On my way out I was able to sneak a pen in my pocket,” Jessica hid her hands behind her as if she was actually going through it all again, “I calmly walked back to my room and when they turned the lights off and shut the doors, I made my move. I shoved as much of the pillow as I could in my mouth to keep me from screaming. I took the pen out of my pocket and dug deep into my wrists. I could feel the sting of my skin ripping part and the ink seeping into my blood stream",”

Kelsi couldn’t help but shout out, “OH MY GOD!”

Jessica smiled, “the pain wasn’t as much as you think it would be, or maybe the anger was in the way. I released the pillow from my mouth and laid back in my bed. The next morning I watched them discover my body and a few hidden notes I had written a year ago saying I wasn’t lying.”

They all looked at Jessica in a way that it seemed like they could feel her pain and understand what she went through.

“My mother knew the truth, but didn’t want to lose all he had given her and because of that, I was ignored. To this day, she fails to admit he hurt me in ways that are unimaginable. Still, I am a lost soul,” one single tear ran down Jessica’s cheek.

Kelsi sat like a statue, “I--I don’t know what to say. I’m so sorry. Do you think my death was like yours?”

Jessica rested her hand on Kelsi’s shoulder, “you really want advice about your death?”

“PLEASE!” Kelsi begged.

“Don’t remember it. A memory once given is never forgotten; won’t even matter if you’re already dead,” walking off into the moonlight Jessica leaves nothing but a speck of dust behind.

Reviews

[Leon C]

A very moving tale. Once a memory is forgotten all that is left is the story.

A vivid portrayal of the after life and limbo. I think a hint at how long some of the spirits had been there would be nice. Just hints are needed, perhaps their clothes or speech patterns. - Just a thought.

Very very good.