Typical Sunday Night

 

Your Favorite

 

I’ve been used.  Shhhhhhh!  It’s our little secret.

That you’ve left me broken and bruised

 

I no longer long for sunlight because I’m only comfortable naked in the still darkness of night

 

You wear your smile so well so deceitful

 

Yet I see it true

 

Until I wake, early, the next day gasping for air and turning blue

 

You see in those moments you used my love to make you strong.  You knew exactly how to make me feel like I belonged. 

 

My chest would ache as dawn would break

 

You would always get up the next day giving me a grand speech about how you can never be with me

 

You watch and see the color fade from my cheeks and the light in my eyes fail to shine.  How foolish to ever think you could be mine.

 

I have the routine down pat.  Still I don’t know why I long for your fake embrace and loving touch you’ll just go back. 

 

Retreat to her the other woman you have feelings for

 

Every time I see you with her I feel like your w***e

 

You left me twenty dollars, your blanket and the picture I made.  Why are you making my spirit fade?

 

You left me with words of comfort and love in my ear

 

But what you did baby embodied all of my most intimate fears.

 

Okay baby I can lie too.  I won’t tell a soul for I am too tired and sad.  However, I know you miss it in that place so bad. 

 

See I’m angry baby because I realize how you’ve done me.  I used to think you loved me

 

You only used me

 

My turn now to make your glow fade

 

I take my bow

 

K.S. 2012

Reviews

[John Holmes]

This is a very sorrowful piece and it is nicely written too! It makes me wonder what she plans to do, it makes me feel for her, hate the man and feel almost indifferent to his wife or women he has feelings for, which i think is a beautiful twist n such an event/situation, very nicely done.

My only critique s some grammar (and i may be wrong) and it is literally just a few comma's missing, i believe their should be one in the second stanza, first line after "naked"? That was literally it and isn't I style critique at all (and I may be wrong) regardless, a wonderful piece to which i can find little fault, well done!

[K.S.78]

You are right about the comma. I am so happy you read my work, it means a lot thank you!

[Shay]

I really enjoyed the development within the poem and how you worded the phrases. even though their was rhyme within some of the lines I really enjoyed it. I also liked the emotions within the poem.

[Simon Welsh]

Ohh powerful. I like.

[K.S.78]

Thanks! :)

[LaVonneTheLovely]

wooow. very nicely written. I really feel for this woman and kudos to her for getting him back! I real like the part " you left me ....intimate fears" - actions speak so much louder than words! great poem and I love your work, in general too- your voice is strong in your writing as is the mood (can be a bit depressing sometimes but its a good thing to affect the reaer so)! feel free to send more read requests in the future- they're a pleasure.

[K.S.78]

Thank you as always

[LaVonneTheLovely]

you are welcome as always!