Operation

I’d grown stagnant
and nearly calcified
a tumor slowly growing deep inside
the love turned blue
and I was petrified
when the scalpel came in contact before I could bat an eye
and I concur, man
I’d f*****g testify
she never had my heart because I never had my mind

so cut me off, I deserve it
that’s what I keep telling myself
I’m a cancer, I’m so hopeless
I won’t even help myself
just wanna be a dog on a leash
keep me with you and take care of me

and when you asked me what’s wrong
well, it was everything
couldn’t even catch my breath
alligator tears kept falling
I’m so worried about what I’ll do
if you don’t keep me around cause I’m no use
and that’s the truth, dear
at least the brunt of it
will I fall out of touch again
and leave you loveless?

I’ll cut it off, we don’t deserve it
it’s a mantra now
it’s just a cancer but I’m not helpless
I can wait it out
don’t wanna be a dead weight on your side
I just want to be the best part of your life

we’re on the prep table now
so bring your tools
a spool of thread and a needle for your future sutured wounds
or look up “how to escape from the surgery room”
can you please cut the anesthesia
I can hardly even move

and this is a riot now
so bring your bricks
knock the walls down, honey
take them all or take your pick
set your defenses
I’m ready to give in
you let you slip behind the lines
I’ll let you win