The Importance of Swimming, Drunk

an older piece i found (again) upon discovering my laptop amongst the house. Based upon an event as told to me by my roommate of the time.

They sat outside on the back balcony. He smoked his cigarette slowly with her fiery acquiesced company to comfort his paranoia. Three beers lay empty with a fourth newly opened beside him on the concrete. He took a drag from his portable cancer and looked at the lake behind the building. "I'm going to jump in that lake," he uttered, a statement of fact, his voice rational and calm. "Ok... That's slightly illegal," she replied, a small double take accompanying her words.

He took another drag of his cig and paused, withholding the smoke from the crisp clean air. "...How illegal?" a small puff of cloud burst forth from behind his teeth and faded away like the laughter that waxed and waned from the gathering inside the apartment. She shrugged her shoulders as she leaned against the wall, momentarily towering above his lanky seated figure, trying to adapt her own 'calm, cool, collected persona' "Slightly."

He mused the idea for a few moments, "I could always tell them your shower was broken, I'd had a few beers, and felt the need to clean myself off. It's perfectly rational," his voice never gained an ounce of excitement or a hint of mischievousness. He was serious, his want to swim in the lake was as real, if not as flimsy, as the grey clouds billowing from his lips.

"There are turtles in there," she said, "They're chicken s**t,"was his reply, "There are bass," "The bass won't know what's coming, they don't pay no mind," "We have some otters, think you can handle them?" He laughed, "So long as they don't gnaw my nuts off I think I'll be fine."

He lept up from his perch and ran back to the others who were still drinking and laughing about sesame street and Elmo's love life going down the crapper. She stood outside a few moments, just overlooking the calm waters and the few clouds drifting over head. He walked discouragingly back out and rejoined her, "I hate being the first one drunk...They don't understand the importance of swimming in the lake."

The air was still and quiet a few moments before he again took another puff of his choice cancer, "So, are there any alligators?"

Reviews

[Sarah Hawkinson]

That was interesting! I don't know if it meant anything or was just a story being told, but I liked it. A lot of metaphors though, almost too many. I mean, I love me some metaphors and such, but too an extent. Too many and you lose the impact that they make. Though just an opinion! I don't think they detracted from the story at all. I really like the simplicity and the short piece of just enough plot, and perfectly formed sentences.

[Alz Alz]

I read a bit of that, that was well written!