Fishing

I don’t have a phenomenal first line so if you’re going to keep on reading this, just know that I haven’t dipped into my tackle box. I’m going to try to reel you in with sincerity. Don’t worry; this will only take a few moments. Have a seat; make yourself comfortable. I’m going to make this as enjoyable as possible.

 

I’ve been thinking about where this relationship is going. I know you’ve been sitting around waiting for a bite, a little tug on the line, some sort of indication that I know you’re there.
I do.

I kind of see it like this: I’m sitting there on this big ‘ol jagged rock next to the water. It gets really boring out there so my mind wanders and my eyes follow. At some point I happen to glance down to where the line meets the water. I’m expecting to see little fishies ignoring the manufactured bait I picked up on my way here but what catches my eye is the line and rod mirrored on the still surface. I can’t quite make out the figure holding the fishing pole but it doesn’t look like me. Weird, right? My fingers knead at my chin, smooth my eyebrows and fix my hair in that nervous sort of way I do and you wave back at me.

You’re my workshop outside of the workshop. You always know how to nag at me in such a way that lets me know for sure something isn’t working. Nag probably seems like a strong word. If it’s putting you off at all, making you want to stop reading right here believe me, I understand. But it’s a necessary word. Because once you start to tell me that something isn’t right I can’t successfully go on any further. You never knew you had such an impact on me, did you? I’ll try and try to construct the next sentence, but honestly my heart isn’t in it until that one thing gets fixed. I know what you’re thinking now… that sometimes I don’t take it very well and I’m not trying to make excuses for all those times I didn’t listen to you but come on. Writing is hard.

But I guess you knew that.

And yeah, I still like having the professors around and classmates who have to read my work and tell me what’s not working but I only need them because you’re not much of a talker. I understand, don’t worry. If you talk too much you’ll scare the fish away. I don’t need you to tell me how to fix it. That’s why I hand my work out to other people.

I need you there to nibble at the line for me. I can see when you’re trying to take hold of what I’ve offered you but you’re not quite buying it yet. That’s when I reel it in, fix the bait a little, and throw it right back out there.

 

You store all of those half-assed ideas for me, too. I know it’s not really in your job description and that I should really give you a break and start writing them down somewhere but I’m selfish sometimes. If someday you quit on me altogether, I’ll understand. Just… please don’t? Then that pothole piece would never get written. That relationship piece with the toast? I might attempt to write it. Oh, and the NPR essay. You know the one… with my dad in it? Yeah. I know you at least think it’ll turn out really well. But if I don’t have you around…

 

I won’t insult you by saying I write for you. I write for me. I love it when a piece is just so utterly successful. It’s a nice little boost to the ego when somebody remembers my characters long after they’re read them. I really take that stuff to heart, you know? So no, I don’t write for you. Not just you, anyway.

 

But I write to you.

 

It may not seem like much but when I cast a line out into the middle of the water I’m just hoping, hoping that someone will bite this time.

 

It’s not always gonna happen. I know this. But I’ll have to there to tell me it’s not working out.

Author's Note

My nonfiction professor asked us who we write to.

Reviews

[Angel's Lady]

I love this piece. You are quite a character and I love the whole idea of this! Hey, lady, you reeled me! I'm too big to keep, might as well throw me back! That'll make you a sport fisherman and sometimes that's not a bad thing to be. You really did a great job on this and I like it very much. Mind if I put it in my favorites? I actually have something that I think you might like...hit me up and I'll be sure to tell you which one...