Exit

Its basically about being in a situation where you feel like there's no way out.

The solace in the sounds of thunder,

Evaporates the pouring rain.

And wicked whispers deep down under,

Makes me feel insane.

The never ending shame of wonder,

And raging fire of the pain.

Sharpens this eternal blunder,

Slashing to the vein.

It burns into my red hot blood,

Inscribed into my tired bones.

My fate setting the horizon's sun,

Emotions carved in ancient stone.

My options stolen by a bandit,

A force that feels like frigid rape.

I run but I can't find an exit,

Stuck to circumstance by tape.

Losing all my hope for higher,

Drags me to the darkest place.

Insatiable like my desire,

To win this land long race.

So I exit to my imaginary place. 

And find illusive solace.

 

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

You left the reader with visions and thoughts.
"Losing all my hope for higher,
Drags me to the darkest place.
Insatiable like my desire,
To win this land long race."
You create journey and final goal. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

Thanks a lot for you interpretation.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Sugar Plum ♥]

Very dramatically described, and a great flow as always. I imagine all that in an intensive picture, or a short film. The need of exit and way out" of the hard situation is experienced many times in life...and usually when we are on a crossroad and will be able to understand some signs of the future "way". I felt also many times in such condition, when there is no way wherever you look. But that is the time to be alone, stop escaping and think well inside yourself. Be quiet and not afraid to face obstacles. Your rhymes are very good and strong in first verses. Really nicely written!

:: nia ::

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

THANKS AGAIN NIA. I'M SOOOOO HAPY THAT MY WORDS CAN TOUCH YOU AND THAT YOU CAN RELATE.

[AprilRN1210]

this is one of my favorites of yours.. you can feel the emotion.. the frustration, the desperation, the determination.. it was real.. palpable.. the power in the meter and rhyme and flawless flow was intense.. not sure about the picture breaking up the stanzas, it distracted me and knocked my train of thought.. (just me though)... well done!.. this also has jaunting imagery.. I enjoyed my friend..

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

Thank you soooo much April.
For reading and sharing your opinion.

[redzone]

that first few lines, really pulls you into the poem.. vivid and viserally felt... living in an imaginary place is a very solitary place indeed...

One thing to think albout is I think in that line ("I run but I can't find and exit,") you may have meant to say "an" and not "and"...

It's a poem where there may not be much solace, cause an imaginary place is just that imaginary and the real world swirls on without us... Thanks for sharing your words Kristan

~~redzone

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

thanks for reading. and the tip. i'll make the change.