The Se7en Sins

Mistakes you can learn from; sins stay with you forever. Corey Taylor

Where there is ego, then PRIDE will be there,
Once bound in WRATH, you suddenly cease to care,
GLUTTONY will always be, to ridicule the hungry,
Happiness will break-up, if you fall for ENVY,
SLOTH is the reason you postponed the necessary deed,
And yet sometimes you work and get none; when you work for GREED,
Even after escaping from all, you should beware of LUST,
For to live and not just exist, you should kill these sins, it's a must.

Reviews

[Psychotic Lily]

Your poem is really powerful. It shows the devastation of sins. Although the theme is quite profound, there are lines which are too verbose that may be shortened to make it more pleasant to the ear.

Ah yeah, "you should kill these sins, it's a must" what if the sin, for example Envy. Let us say you are envious of other people. So when you meet someone new, you tend to test out whether if they are better or below you. Like testing their intelligence or school/work performance. You can sometimes us it as an asset to tell which people are good at this and that. So to me it seems that these "sins" can be an asset. Just a thought though.

Anyway, wonderful read. Keep up the good work.

[Crowley]

A clever way to reframe the Seven Deadly Sins for sure. Kind of gives examples for those who are not wuite sure if their deeds are on the edge or not...lol. Good writing, I enjoyed it!

[Onlyme]

Your poem speaks the truth about human downfalls very eloquently done sir!