Hillbilly Inventions

Here's another tale about hillbillies

That you probably don't wanna miss

It's about their many inventions

And the story goes something like this

Now see my great, great grandfather

Was kind of an inventor of sorts

He invented stuff like wooden teeth

And a lotion that removed your warts

He invented the very first wheelbarrow

He made my granny carry everything

He even invented the first telephone

Two cans and a piece of string

He even invented the first wooden leg

But those termites gave him a fit

Until he finally made it termite proof

By soakin' it in tobacco spit

Did I say he invented the first eyeglasses?

He cut the bottoms off two coke bottles

And everytime my granny would put them on

They would laugh and say she waddles

He also invented the first light bulb

Lightning bugs in a jar

Fireflies for you folks up north

Just so you know what they are

See he invented a lot of things

Like the bathroom without a sink

Course we just call it an outhouse

A place where we could think

Well the history books don't mention him yet

But I know in time that they will

Did I tell you that he only smiled,

When we asked him who invented the wheel?