Buffy Jean Pants

A Story by LindaLou

A short story about my 'grand puppy.'

A couple of years ago, I was on a camping trip not too far from home. I left my 18 year old at home because she had to go to work. Katie had been talking about wanting a new puppy but I was adamant about NOT having a puppy, new or otherwise. After a night away, I was texting with Katie to make sure everything was okay at home. It was of course, nothing to worry about.

That evening she went to work and was going to text me when she made it home. It wasn't very far from home to work, but I just wanted to be sure she was okay. So when my phone beeped, I knew right away it was Katie and immediately looked at the text to make sure all was well. The text went something like this "I made it home and this is our new puppy". "WHAT" ????? New puppy??? She had sent a photo which showed a little white pit bull puppy with one brown ear and one white ear. Cute puppy, but I was livid to say the least. She had some nerve bringing a puppy home after I had said no repeatedly.

So I was headed home the following day and stewing about the puppy thing. I think I got madder and madder as I got closer to home. I had an entire speech prepared for Katie, "I told you ...." and so on and so forth. I pulled into the drive, turned off my car, stepped out and stomped up the steps, angry as a wet hen and prepared to let it all out. I opened the front door and and all the anger I felt dissipated immediately. There she stood holding that cute puppy at my face level and I fell, in love that is. I fell in love instantly and forever. Talk about love at first sight.

That puppy is now 2 1/2 years old and her name is Buffy Jean Pants. Her last name came about one day when I noticed she has a spot on her bottom that looks like a pair of pants. So she became "Ms. Pants". We go shopping at the local pet store and they know her there as Ms. Pants. Her middle name is the same as mine, which was also my mother's first name. This name came about one day when Buffy was getting in trouble, I started to say her name. But I ran into a problem. You see, here in the south, when a child gets into trouble, they are typically called by their first and middle name together, often sounding like one long name. Like my boyfriend Billy (Wayne), his family calls him Billywayne, like its one name!

Anyway, back to Buffy. She was getting in trouble and lacked sufficient names to serve the purpose! So I was fussing at her and I said "Buffy....", "Buffy..." "Buffy Jean Pants". Needless to say, it stuck big time.

She has an Indian name too. Her coloring is mostly white, with three reddish spots along one side. Katie was playing with her one day, touching each spot and simultaneously saying 'spot'. So, you heard 'spot spot spot'. That was when her Indian name of 'Buffy Three Spots' came about. Of course, along with her 'regular' names, she has a whole list of nicknames. Among those are simply 'Pants', along with 'BJP', 'Fubby' (that's Buffy spelled backwards) and 'Peshy', which anyone with a pet will know stands for precious. You can't forget the lists of names that include 'pants.' Sometimes she is smarty pants and other times she is stinky pants. After all, she is a dog, just don't tell her that.

Buffy even has her own vocabulary. Like most dogs, I mean girlies, she knows what a toy is. But, this girly knows which one is pink and which is blue. Tell her to go get her blue toy and see what she brings back to you! We call her words 'spoily words' because she is spoily. Her vocabulary includes 'moof' which mean move; 'mover' which means move over; 'goff'... get off; 'gout' ... get out; 'gin'... get in; 'mere'... come here; 'mon'... come on; 'scover'... scoot over; supper; hungry; thirsty; water; 'baff'... bath; bye bye; potty; mama; nana; dad; go see; nite nite; bug; speak; 'mell'... smell; bite; be still... and I'm sure I've left something out.

We have another girly named Annie. We can tell Buffy to 'go see Annie' and she will run over and give her kisses. Buffy has a pet bird too, a cockatoo named Riley whom she hounds to no end. She knows the word 'bird' as well as the name Riley and she will 'go see her bird' and tell him nite nite. Of course the bird thinks Buffy is his dog, and we prefer to let him think so. We occasionally hear him calling her "Buffy Jean Paaaaants" or he'll say "I love you Buffy" in his funny bird voice.

Along with having an entire list of words she understands, she can talk. Yes, I said talk. While she has many things she understands, she is limited to what she can say. Her 'speaking' vocabulary consists of "I love you" and she will say it repeatedly for the tiniest bite of people food. She doesn't get much people food though, she has severe allergies and we have to limit her intake, but she's okay with bits of fresh chicken and fruit.

She's a busy girly, going through her day chasing toys, picking on Annie or poking Riley's cage. She loves to run outside and I mean RUN... full speed ahead, no holding back. Thankfully, we live in the country so she has plenty of room to run all she wants to. She starts every morning by waking up Katie. She'll get nose to nose and breathe on her Mama and stare at her until she's awake. It's a pretty funny thing. She ends her days the same each day. She makes her rounds telling everyone 'night night'. First her bird Riley, then her girly Annie and last of all her Nana. She'll come to me and put her big ole feet in my lap and lay her head on my chest, close her eyes and snuggle against me. I give her hugs and scratch her back a little and she goes off wagging her tail. She's so sweet and lovable. Life with her is never boring, that's for sure.

As I finish up this story Katie has just let her out to potty. Buffy didn't realize it was raining outside and she took off out the door like she always does. She didn't stay out long, though, she did an about face and came right back inside. Once she was in, she proceeded to have what is known in our house as 'a moment'. This 'moment' consists of this 60 pound pit bull tucking her tail and bunny hopping as fast as she can move up and down the long hallway of our house. Back and forth she goes as I type, all the while Katie is saying playfully "Buffy's all wet, Buffy's all wet". This continues for a minute or two, up and down, 'round and 'round. Now its 'baff' time.