You are raping my Soul

A Poem by LiterAnART

Dear man of my dreams
Friend of my journey
Brother of my home
Father of my children
Soldier of my army
Beloved creature
…
You are raping my soul!
You are abusing my thrill
You are beating my valuable time…
My time I weighted to be yours
While you washed away …even your shadow…
Away from me!
My galaxy entirely belonged to you
While you were raping my soul
From distance…from remoteness…
I gave you my depths
And you made them pieces.
I offered you my breathing
And you ordered the wind to blow it away.
I permitted your figure into my space
But you left with my complexion
Printed in your art…
…and I remained faceless…heartless…
You are raping my soul
With your silence,
With your unavailability
For my womanly beauty.
Words of worthless meaning
And clusters of stars…
Were all falling into my raped soul…
Making it even heavier
When carrying myself into the world.
Are you going to shout inside my being
So your echo would cover it
And fill it in freshness …my poor naked soul?
Will you ever love me
The way I love you
Or are you going
To rape my soul over and over again
In eternity and wishful thinking?

Dear man to whom I gave my soul as a gift
No to be raped but to be celebrated
In harmony and peace,
Will you listen at midnight
The stories of my soulful kingdom
Or are you going to become deaf
To my immortal love affair?

You are raping my soul
With your complicated fanciful feeling
That settles in harbor for a second
So it can disappear in eternity… bellow stars.
You are raping my soul
When showing me anxiety, care and ignorance.
You are raping my soul
When by all means you fly backwards
Into a wrapped up gift for the sea.
You are raping my soul
When you raise me at your chest
And when you pull your cigarette from your pocket
And lighten it in front of me …
…keeping me out of hail…
You are raping my soul
When you recreate me from sculpture
And worship me in a stone
When today I`m everything,
A real human at shore
But tomorrow…I`m nowhere
Waiting the eternity and the love …in store.
You are raping my soul
When you dress up your books
With pieces of my skin
Imagined…like I never existed in.
You are raping my soul
Ever since you`ve said ‘’no more’’
And you`ve drowned me
Into the paradox of life and at its core.
You are raping my soul
For short time in profane
But for an eternity in sacred.
You are raping my soul
When you say ‘’yes’’ but after you say ‘’no’’
When I want to touch you
But you do not exist.
When I want to hear you
But your voice is voiceless.
When I thought you were real
But now I came to believe
You are a fairy character…in disbelief.
When I put all my trust in who you are
And you scatter it in colors.
When I used to know who you were
But now I do not acknowledge any longer.
You are raping my soul
When you still live in your fantasy.
You are raping my soul
In your emotionally unavailable state
…why all this…so far, so long?
Haven’t I loved you enough
So you can grow at peace
Along with my seeds that you planted
…and beads?
I`ve grown old with you
I thought you were too…with me besides you.
You raped by soul…all the way…
While I loved you in pain, sorrow and grief
And you offered my time to anyone else…
No matter who was…in brief…