Bloodstone

A dark piece of poetry I wrote during a time when writing became my outlet.

Don't want to work... 

Don't want to eat... 

Can not bring myself to sleep...

 your face will be there when I slip away.

Finally admitIng defeat.

Pain inflicted, it is bitter and it hurts, 

With the pain and the pleasure in a neat little package, 

This is what I receive when he is near 

I am a 

bloodstone

Discarded by the shore. 

Lifeless but there is a sign. 

Break me and find the source, 

Like an addict. 

I go back for more for the bittersweet sensation. 

Can't walk... 

Can't talk... 

Can't bare a single thought... 

your face will be there to torment me as I gaze far away.

Admitting the truth even if it is only to myself. 

How far can he see? 

Can he see in to me?

Or is he staring right through my spiritual vapour? 

I am a bloodstone, 

can you see the tell-tale signs, 

Take me and find the child, 

Forgotten everything but where the door is. 

Trying to remember...

Trying to forget...

Trying to move on... 

The first step is the hardest. 

Admitting that this is a phase... 

then everything will be ok... 

Someday