Poetic Masks

For my muse, who never ceases to inspire...

I have written

of desert constellations

   trying to capture

the endless veneration

I have for your words,

whispered,

             never heard.

 

I have scribbled,

prosaic ideals

trying on masks

                  of poetry.

But this poem,

as I say it, feels

-as though it lacks

what it’s supposed to be.

 

     I am

                lacking.

 

I have sought,

words elegant and strong,

in english and spanish,

in places familiar

            and outlandish,

in poetry and song;

and yet

                 all fall short.

 

I have dreamed,

of you in moments of waking

       and those inbetween;

forsaking the world around

    for the hope

that one with you can be found,

if only I can gain your trust,

    with my soul

written in words, discussed

in long talks.

I hope to shake the dust,

from your heart,

which you have stowed away,

in a secret part,

of yourself,

       there to stay…

                         …or so you say.

 

I lack the deftness

to capture your soul

and the beauty of your heart.

          For it is beautiful…

because you are full,

of things more wonderful,

than all my words;

all the colours of the desert,

all the stories of constellations,

made of distant stars.

It is absurd,

to think these poetic spurts

can shed any indication

upon who you are.

They are simply…

  who you are to me

                        and still fall short.

You are all these things...

                              and so much more.

Reviews

[Circe]

very ardent expression of utmost admiration for your muse.. perhaps poetry was made to serenade such beauty in the eye of the romantic.. certainly you have accomplished this most exquisitely in your honest, elegant tributes.... it could not be considered merely as a single tribute.... I think to say that all your words fall short of honouring your muse is the highest measure of praise.

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you. I have been trying to write and learn and be a better poet for a while now, hoping to express that admiration for some time now. I write something, seems to come close, and falls short, the words now tasting bitter in what they lack. Thank you for you kind words.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

rather than necessarily showing the speaker trying to be a better poet...i see this as the poet being unable to capture the aura of a loved one...i can't find the right words to describe you, or how i feel about you...

i am but a humble poet...lacking the strong enough expression, to show you how i really feel.

it is like the person who can chatter up a storm, generally. But then that person meets someone who just simply makes him or her tongue-tied.

jacob

[MachinaWriter]

That's it exactly, and that's exactly how I felt. Usually I carry a conversation so well, and I've been told I'm good with words, but the person this was written for was that kind of person. Made me realize that I don't have any good words, because I'm just a humble poet. All the fanciful words in the world couldn't describe that feeling, at the end of it, and so I find myself...silenced.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i was always like with dating...i am not a shy person as far as meeting people...very outgoing...women included...because i first and foremost thought of them as friends....but if there happened to be that person i felt those different feelings for? tongue tied as all hell.

[Sirius King]

beautifully worded...
it may inspire me to write something...
ive been goin thru a poetic drought lately lol

[MachinaWriter]

Hate those things lol Gotta seek water elsewhere when that happens, is all.

[Sirius King]

lol true

[Kelsey]

"I lack the deftness
to capture your soul
and the beauty of your heart.
For it is beautiful…"

Goodness, my friend, this was absolutely beautiful. I really hope you're sharing these pieces with your lovely fiance, for they're too amazing not to share with the one they must be about. Amazing work, as always. I'm nothing short of impressed. x

[MachinaWriter]

We...we're not together anymore. You may have remembered that poem The Heartbreaker I wrote a while back. That was about that. And then they got kinda depressing for a bit again. I've only recently been able to move away from that and start feeling better and actually happen again.

[MachinaWriter]

Due to a new friend, the "muse" I keep referring to. But its alright, you didn't know.

[Kelsey]

Oh goodness..I am so sorry, dear. If you need to talk, or anything, anything at all, please don't hesitate to message me. I'm here for you, never forget that. You're one of the strongest people I've known, and with that being said, I'm certain you'll get through this and come out stronger. Hang in there, lovely.

[Damien Davison]

Amazing... I want to quote the whole first half on this review and say how awesome it was but I kinda just did without quoting it... Don't mind me. Great poem man!

[MachinaWriter]

lol Thanks, man. Yeah, I'm content with this poem, but I think that mainly goes to the title lol I'm usually horrible at titles, they all suck, but I liked the title for this one haha

[MachinaWriter]

I spend more time trying to come up with a title than writing the poem, no lie lol xD

[Southern Cross]

Could you please explain what is lacking? I can't comprehend that statement. Your poems always make me a believer in love, romance and men that actually have a heart that beats for reasons other than to pump blood to sustain live.

[MachinaWriter]

What is lacking is the "right" words. If there are any such words out there. The ones that when said, explain all the emotion, all the thoughts, hopes, and dreams I have. Ones that when said, break through all walls and pull turtles out of shells. I haven't found them yet, but I'm working on it. lol

[*~*Butterfly Kisses*~*]

Its hard to find the words to describe what love can do to a person once they found someone that truely makes them feel like they are at home in that person. Beautifully written. Nicely done.

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you ^^

[eglantine]

Powerful line, "I am lacking" although I think you can really enhance it by line breakage. Try putting "lacking" on the next line, perhaps even a few indents in. Makes the reader pause, and enhances the actual meaning of "lacking" by the empty space, the lacking of. I hope that makes sense lol. I'm still on my first cup of coffee.

Muses are very interesting. Thank you for sharing.

[MachinaWriter]

Thank you, I think I know what you mean, though I may not lol I'll try and work it in, somehow. And yes, muses are very interesting. This one, at least to me, is especially so.