Feel

The word that comes to mind is prisoner. Not a typical one but a prisoner nonetheless. It has been days, no weeks since I last felt awake, I'm not sure how much of this I can take. The gift of time is an endless curse as I watch everyone pass me by. Awake or asleep, I sometimes wonder which of the two I am.I can still feel love, at least  I think I still do,it seems to escape me every time I grab onto it.So I pass the time by distracting myself with other things.I write meaningless words I call poems. I shouldn't think about the darkness but I can't leave it alone. Every time I fall asleep I dream the same thing I dream every night. I don't dream of being surrounded by friends and family, they surround me when I'm awake. I don't dream of having amazing adventures because to me everyday is a new adventure that I am thankful for. I don't dream of endless wealth or an extravagant life, I feel blessed enough as it is. So what is it that I dream of you might wonder? Well I dream of the same life I live right now with one  difference, and this difference means the world to me. Without it I feel like life is a monochrome movie. Without it everything  tastes the same. Without it life isn't life at all. So please hurry up and get here. Because without you by my side, my heart just can't feel.