Crave

Crave

A Poem by Miaria

 

i wish i could touch your face

i wish i could remember your taste

i remember our last kiss

& me thinking "I could get used to this."

for all the ones i've loved

you were the only one

to make my heart skip a beat

to make me weak at the knees

i wish i had one more chance

to prove myself to you

i wouldnt take one moment for granted

you are like a drug

you are all i need

you are what i crave

you are everything.

 

 

© 2009 Miaria


Author's Note

Miaria
All of these poems were written about the same boy who broke my heart. Cheesy, I know.

My Review

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Featured Review

It has a ballad feel, like it can be set to music. Not cheezy because they're your feelings. But as a crit I would say the word choice is a bit cliche. "you are like a drug" is an overused term. Now if you explained your addiction in detail, it would be special for the reader. TITLE IT!! Grrr!

Overall has great rhythm and pace. I enjoyed it quite a bit! Keep up the creative work, I'll keep reviewing.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

"i wish i could touch your face
i wish i could remember your taste"

Very short, sweet, and to the point. Straightforward, no dancing around it, just flat out honesty and beauty. I really like the line length. For some reason, I thoroughly enjoy short lines in poetry. It almost seems to help the flow/rhythm, especially when the message is so explicit, and there's not a lot of need for fluffy filler words and rhetoric.

Well done!



Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It has a ballad feel, like it can be set to music. Not cheezy because they're your feelings. But as a crit I would say the word choice is a bit cliche. "you are like a drug" is an overused term. Now if you explained your addiction in detail, it would be special for the reader. TITLE IT!! Grrr!

Overall has great rhythm and pace. I enjoyed it quite a bit! Keep up the creative work, I'll keep reviewing.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wish I touch your face,remember your very taste
Remembered our last kiss,knew I could never get used to this
Of all the ones I known ,you were the one to start my heart to beat again
You make me weak,wish I had another chance on you..will prove myself worthy of you
Now I will never take anything for granted ,you were my drug ,all I need ,all I craved for..you are my everything
Oh what lovely write..

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is wonderful
I like how it is setup as well
Has a smooth flow to it.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I also love this poem. The emotion in it is great. It's a great poem.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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5 Reviews
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Added on July 13, 2009
Last Updated on November 29, 2009

Author

Miaria
Miaria

sumter, SC



About
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