A Childhood Destroyed

The evil perpetrated on children

I'm angry, depressed and filled with self hate.

Something bad happened back when I was eight.

A close family friend that everyone trusted,

Left me used and abused, my innocence busted.

The guilt that I feel... was it something I'd done?

Why did I let him? Why didn't I run?

But what could I do? I was only a kid.

I'm not to blame for what that b*****d did!

It was many years later, I raised the alarm,

After years of addiction and deliberate self harm.

My friends and my family saw I was in pain,

re-living the nightmare again and again.

I'm getting some help now, I'm starting to live.

But if I live to a thousand I'll never forgive,

The scumbag that stole my childhood away,

And I promise I'll murder that monster some day!

Author's Note

This is not autobiographical. It's my attempt at putting myself in the place of an abuse survivor.

Reviews

[alf]

Hi Mick. My hat off to you. It is so difficult to capture the emotions of a person who suffered any kind of abuse, yet you have managed to portray that inner shame, frustration and anger (rage) that festers in a victim's mind. This is an extremely empathetic write, a marvellous piece of penmanship, and an excellent display of the emotional trauma faced by so many who have no means to fight back. Thank you for writing this on behalf of anyone able to express their gratitude!!!! alf

[Mick Burke]

Thanks for yet more kind words Alf. I'm delighted that you are liking my stuff.

[alf]

Hi Mick. have to explain from the outset here. I am never kind!!! As in, I write it as I see it. if I read something okay, I will say its okay. if I think its good, I will say so as well. Watch out if I think its bad (LOL). Sorry, but I don't do kind because it doesn't help an author appreciate the level of their writing, alf

[Mick Burke]

Glad to hear it Alf. An honest review is the most beneficial review.

[B]

I have a child that suffered abuse
By many people
And i must tell you
My heart breaks every time i see him go through anguish
I removed everyone around him that was engaging in such activity
But its not something incurable
And i know how hard it is

I spent 7 to 8 months waking up and sleeping to hitting from a little small child .... he was angry ..... and i let him express it out ..... its his right after everything he experienced. And eventually he stopped and let it go

I had to witness seeing the person who harmed my child every single day. And i got angry and i had an outburst
But anger doesn't solve it
It never will

And i know its not easy to get rid of the anger because abuse is unfair

The only to way rid yourself of all this ..... is to find a place to let it go
And replace all the pain with love

Being around the people that love you .... a soul will heal

Leaving those nasty people behind
Their acts are their problem for life

I love this piece
You did a great job
Out of pain much beauty is created

That's quite impressive and unique in every way possible

[Mick Burke]

Thank you for your review. I'm so sorry that your child had to go through this. I don't understand how anybody could willfully harm a child.

[Workvio]

This is a very passionate and thought provoking write ... It is so easy for many of us to fail to even try to understand what such tragic events would do to us, if it were us rather than always someone else that we read or hear about ... Sadly, it is my personal opinion and observation that forgiveness is a must requirement in ever hoping to heal from horrible events and abuse such as you pen above, even if the culprit never confesses or apologizes ... There is something about un-forgiveness that, not only holds the culprit prisoner to his wicked deeds but also, holds the victim prisoner to the culprits wicked deeds, trapped in the past and unable to move forward into the light and hope of a brighter future ... A victim can never forget, but if they can forgive and let it go, then there is hope for true healing, and the culprit can simply go on living eaten alive and devoured by his own conscience until he is no more ... A difficult task if you are the victim, but not impossible ... Of course we all have opinions, but that does not make us all right ... Well penned ...

[Mick Burke]

Thanks for the review. I agree that forgiveness is the path to healing, but I don't know if I would be able to forgive in these circumstances.

[Workvio]

Yes, we can all see the solution, but could we do it if it were us? ... Tough ... Very tough ... Thanks for understanding my words and my sincere intent ... Nice to meet you ...

[Marie]

I'm certainly glad it didn't happen toyou.Good job of seeing life from another perspective.

[Mick Burke]

Thanks Marie.