You won't win

Can't sleep...cant breathe...can't think...

For years I've tried to push you aside, away...push past you...
But I just pushed you down...down, down...& you keep trying to push your way back again...

Taking over...pushing, pushing...I can feel you taking over inch by inch. Little by little...Making the pain come back all over again...im feeling weak, miserable and very emotional.

How? Why now..? Leave me alone. I hate the darkness. I thought I was in control...but your winning...
I'm not going to let you. I'm going to beat this...beat you...until you are finally gone.

I'm going to fight you head on...and I'm going to win! Because I'm worth it. You will stay down this time. I've got this!