Microstory 64: The Package

Microstory 64: The Package

A Story by Nick Fisherman
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This is a microstory. You'll have to read it to find out what it's about.

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My parents are on vacation in Hawaii, so I’ve been going to their house every few days to grab the mail and water some plants. When I get there today, I see a package. The label has their address, but it lists two names that I do not recognize. I send a text message to my mother, and she tells me that one of the people listed lives to the West of them, while the other lives to the East. She must be busy, because I don’t get a response when I ask which house I should take it to. It seems strange to me that two people who live in separate houses would both receive a single package. Perhaps the sender realized this and decided to split the difference by sending it to the house in between them. I flip a proverbial coin and walk over to place the package at the West house. When I get back to my parents’ I see the package has returned. And it must be the same package. I don’t have an eidetic memory, or anything, but the creases on the cardboard and the marks on the corners are the same as I remember them. If it’s just a duplicate, it’s a very good one. I take it back over to the West house, but the same thing happens again. I decide that the package magically knows where it’s supposed to be, and will default to the beginning until it’s put in the right place, so I take it over to the East house. Yet again, I find that it has defaulted to my parents’ porch. Before I can think of a third option, I hear ticking. On instinct, I run towards the street, but it isn’t far enough. The package explodes and sends me colliding into my car. When I wake up hours later at the hospital, the police inform me that the explosion stretched across all three houses, killing all those inside.

© 2015 Nick Fisherman


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Not bad, not bad. The whole west, east thing threw me off balance a bit but the ending was a surprise, and that's always a good thing. Besides that I like the shortness of it. I mean it is called a microstory... but it's just enough to leave an impression without being a drag. And the plot of course is pretty decently thought out. I wonder if the parents knew that was going to happen? If that's why they went to Hawaii in the first place...? Well done :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nick Fisherman

9 Years Ago

Lol, I hadn't thought it through enough to consider what the parents were thinking. That would be pr.. read more



Reviews

Not bad, not bad. The whole west, east thing threw me off balance a bit but the ending was a surprise, and that's always a good thing. Besides that I like the shortness of it. I mean it is called a microstory... but it's just enough to leave an impression without being a drag. And the plot of course is pretty decently thought out. I wonder if the parents knew that was going to happen? If that's why they went to Hawaii in the first place...? Well done :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nick Fisherman

9 Years Ago

Lol, I hadn't thought it through enough to consider what the parents were thinking. That would be pr.. read more

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Added on May 21, 2015
Last Updated on May 21, 2015
Tags: address, car, coin, eidetic memory, experimental, explosion, house, microfiction, microstory, package, parents, police, short fiction, vacation

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Nick Fisherman
Nick Fisherman

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BE SURE TO READ MY ONGOING NOVEL SERIES, THE ADVANCEMENT OF MATEO MATIC PUBLISHED VOLUME 1 (2015): http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/624899 2016 Installments: http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/N.. more..

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A Story by Nick Fisherman