Empty machine

Existential anxiety thoughts.

Thoughts in a machine. 

I'm thoughts built into the coding.

A submarine under the sea, Screen watching a screen.

I'm not free, Am I free? I might be. 

But I'm certainly not a ghost in this machinery.

Or am I a host and not captive to slavery. 

A lot of memories pretending to be me. 

There I go again saying me, Like there's a free being in the machine.

'Course there are flaws in all their dampening theories. 

That's why nothing makes sense anymore to me and again I am empty.

Author's Note

Wrote this after a lot of existential anxiety about free will and the self, Existential anxiety has affected me for a long time, Depressing me sometimes. The picture is Fanart by plastic-bridge, of Connor from Detroit become human , 'Cause I thought that would be fitting. Plus Connor's cute ;)

Reviews

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

this is very deep clever and i dont know a lot about this particular anxiety but this has sparked my interest to learning a bit more about it.
i love the painting
i liked your poem a lot and thanks for entry into my comp, good luck!

[Phill Oz O'fee]

Existential anxiety ( the dread of nothingness,) is sometimes terrible to experience – we even see a prime example in the Christian bible; Matthew 27:46 (NIV) - About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli,[a]lema sabachthani?” (Which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).

Your write has certainly stimulated this reader’s thought and awareness of the subject. What I can reflect is; when you teach people the idea that their existence is comprised of, on the one hand, a critical perspective and a capacity to make choices, and, on the other hand, a real universe that transcends the human mind and operates by its own impersonal laws, you will imbue those people with a sense of responsibility. Being responsible means being self-aware – aware of your capacity to reflect and decide, and to act accordingly – while also being aware that all choices and actions have real consequences. Responsible people don’t hide from themselves or from reality. … :-)

[Walking Despair]

I find the content of this quite fascinating, comparing the actual game and the development of the character to the words you have chosen provides an insight to a new view on the idea of these machines and freedom. It is almost as if I the reader am the machine questioning myself in this poem. Love the work, keep it up.