Perfect picture box

A Poem by Notkat

A poem about how it feels to love someone knowing things will never be how they were because of decisions made. Yet despite those decisions and knowing it won't work, still acting the same as before

You are not who you were
And I am not as accepting
You can't understand the demons that run ramped in my mind
And I can't make you stop and realize I am here for you
Our hearts are ice
We are too afraid of letting the spiderweb cracks spread
We are too afraid to once again love each other
But we built this place
We found a haven
And in this haven
We are again what we once were
You can write me pretty songs
And I can tell you sad stories
We could just stay here
In this perfect picture box
And we'll play pretend till our fingers are numb
And our throats hurt from the lies we build
Because perfection isn't attainable
With who we are
And what we do
This is our life
It is pain
It is laughter
It is hate
It is our perfect picture box
We can continue to let the truth crush us
Or we can run to that place
The place where the lies and the hurt
Are compartmentalized into little blue and red boxes
That we shove behind us
And lean on to keep closed
To keep the facade
To keep us sane
Facing those boxes is too much
And opening them would kill this illusion
And we could be happy
If only just for those fleeting moments
In that perfect picture box
But our box is just paper
So please don't cry
Don't face the reality of all these lies
Or our perfect picture box will tear
We won't have a place to play pretend
We won't have a place to escape what is really here
We will have to face each other and know
you broke this love
I put up these walls
You ran away
I couldn't catch up
You don't love me
I don't know who you are
Because outside of this perfect picture box
There is no more blue house
We will never grow old by the ocean
I will never be in that dress
You will never be in that tux
We will never have that dance
I will never be enough
You will never tear down my walls
We will see
That we are two imperfections
Trying too hard to be perfect for each other
So please don't cry in our perfect picture box
I can't lose our pretend perfection
I can't lose the lie I tell myself you are
I hope
That you can't lose this illusion
That you can't face the reality
I hope that we can just live here
In our perfect picture box