L.S Stained Cigarettes

A Poem by Gavin Haley

About a love you cant forget nor really forgive yourself for so it begins to torture you day in and day out.

I've felt and seen these long enough.
Yet I leave so much unsaid.
While our time races to no end
I inhale this love stained smoke
Thoughts of you pretrude from my skin.
As it crawls over me ,I feel the heart of it all.
Through all the fights you stood there arms extended for me to embrace your loving eyes.
Locked in a gaze I will always stand there frozen in time with no words to carry you or I further along this road we called love.
I'm tearing my skin apart looking for the man I was when you first met me.
So full of ambition and all the while our smiles filled the air with laughter, like clouds I could simply float on it.
Now I just suffocate as I sit

Give me the love so I can love myself.
Before I destroy my own heart, that I store in a jar on a dusty book shelf.
I'm so tired of carrying all of these broken pieces down this lonesome road
I can't mend the picture perfect moments of our lovely book.
Well ill rip out a page of your notebook and see myself for what I am and always will be.
Just another lip stick stained cigarette that was slowly killing you.
It just took some time for your words to sink in.

I can't love enough to save myself.

Give me the love so I can love myself.
Before I destroy my own heart, that I keep in a jar on that dusty book shelf.
I'm so tired of carrying all of these broken pieces down this lonesome road
I can't mend the picture perfect moments of our lovely book.
Well ill rip out a page of your notebook and see myself for what I am and always will be

Just another pathetic excuse for a man
That could never muster up the nerve.
To quit thinking about his past mistakes and how my thoughts wont stop long enough for me to quit bothering you.
Its alright.
Im okay.
Ill just crawl out of this bed and walk to get
another carton of these lip stick stained cigarettes so ill know what it feels like to be in your shoes, ever so slowly decaying and wishing for one peaceful night.