Meloncholly in the middle of the tunnel; the unrequited lovestory

I've been in abuses all my life and this is an opinion letter/statement I have about how important the one person is in m life and me realizing it only to find that I may never see him again

I have a friend Ive seen again recently at the same hospital I saw him at 3 years ago. I recently suffered abuses because one, the man got physical with me and he flat out lied to me that he'd never hurt a woman. My friend has been my welcoming committee and love. I only imagine us being together in any way; as a couple or even intimately in a mature relationship. I want to see him on the outs but he lives across the state.

I'm leaving my 11 year raised town for my birth town up north in Idaho. I would like to start a podcast because I have genuine opinions for my world of people, a joint responsibility to care for and provide truth. Truths that are stated without absolute claim as anything being right or wrong or me claiming anything but just to pick a brain.

I only hope to be successful somehow and build my own spread even if I have to live in a trailer for cryin out loud..

Regardless, I love my friend so much that I can only pray to Emanuel for us to be together. He's the only person in my life that I've noticed doesn't make me cry- instead, he's there for me and supports me. True tears scream down my face because I've never known love other than from my grandpa on my dads side and my grandmother on my moms.

People have always (well, a lot of the time) would take advantage of me and use me until they've got what they wanted and slowly phase me out. 

My friend like me, has a motor mouth and always makes me laugh. Right now, he's the one important friend I have. 

My family here wont talk to me but I figure skipping off to the mountains will help me find my golden five star start and give my mom a break.  want realness and this is just one fraction why I'm starting a web and audio pocast.

CRAZY HAZEL on Leaders Feavers, 
or                       Tokers N Wokers

Whatever the case, I cant do a thing about it now until I leave the hospital and get to salmon

MECKLENBERG