Tomorrow

The warmth of the next season can't be written when the pages are already filled.

Oh, I don't know if I'll miss you.
Were you truly my best friend?
Yesterday, you left without me again
And today, I don't think I can crawl back.

My pages are filled to the brim with black ink
I have one more page until the cherry blossoms
'Something good about my day'
I need to write again
But my hands just shake

Without you, my world cracks like ice
And snow falls like it itself is forever young, with its life ahead
Everything I scribble is dangerously dark
My black thoughts pass through every day
Unlike the season, they leave a trace
My blackened mind - don't go away
I sulk; my back against a bereaving bark tree that just lost its frail leaves

I try again
My migraine aches
What should I write?
My heart faints
What should I write?
But I get up again

What should I write?

Even worse, the pretty flakes melt and soak the pages
I question if marching through the snow is really worth it
I can't feel anything as the world turns
I can't keep accepting my refusal to refuse.

Yet the blanketed world still holds me down
to watch Winter melt on this last day
It's just the same
I've watched it melt for years now; the snow will bury me next year
And that flower of Me won't spring anyway

This time, it's absolute
In the dark night, there will be my light
Everything goes black and I'll see white
You'll see the pink petals
Let me fly
You'll be alright

Chitter chatter on the streets cause sorrow
"The weather says it'll be sunny tomorrow"

While rainbows are bound for when Spring awakens at dawn
And whilst cherry blossoms bloom past this day
On this one last snowy day become my sunbrilla
Don't let my final page soak and rip and tear
through my heart.

I'll miss you.
But don't miss me.

IFor the final time, I'm alone again.