Whose fault is it anyway?

October 23, 2013: Please “Share” this new Blog Post for Precious Prodigal: Whose fault is it anyway? http://www.preciousprodigal.com/blog/blog=index.html

1 Samuel 30:6 “And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.”

David and his band of men had gone with the Philistines to fight but had been sent back home to their city of Ziklag because the Philistines didn’t trust them. When they arrived home, they found that the Amalekites had come while they were gone, had taken their wives and children and all their possessions and burned their city to the ground. 1 Samuel 30:4 tells us that David and the men with him “wept until they had no more power to weep.” These men weren’t grieving their possessions or their homes. They were devastated by the loss of the people they loved. I can understand that and so, no doubt, can you. Those of us who love a prodigal can almost certainly identify with their grief. We too have cried until there were no more tears.

However, they didn’t just weep and grieve the children they thought they had lost. The Scripture tells us that because their souls were grieved for their sons and daughters they began to talk about stoning David. Grief can make us do many things and act in ways we normally wouldn’t. It can even sometimes cause us to be cruel and to strike out at others…even those who are also hurting…because that kind of pain looks for someone to blame. They had chosen to follow David, and David was not the enemy. But logic and reason don’t matter to someone who is grieving. Their hearts were broken, and they weren’t thinking clearly.

As I read that story, I immediately identified with their pain. I even understood their blaming David and striking out. It isn’t easy to respond kindly to the people around us when our own hearts are breaking. And if we’re not careful, we can find ourselves looking around for someone to blame. Those men didn’t consider that David too was grieving or that they were adding to his sorrow by blaming him for something that wasn’t his fault. It’s interesting to me that David’s response wasn’t to strike back. Instead, he “encouraged himself in the Lord his God.” He then sought the Lord’s will and direction.

They ended up pursuing the Amalekites, and their wives and children were restored to them unharmed. Perhaps they came away from that experience a little wiser. I hope they did because it didn’t help them to strike out at everyone around them because of their pain. And it won’t help us either. When we get caught up in the “If you had…” or “If I had…” game, all it does is add to the sorrow of everyone around us, including ourselves. It would be so much better if we would “encourage ourselves in the Lord” and remind ourselves that speaking the truth in love often means saying nothing at all.

Challenge for Today: Can you, just for today, stop playing the blame game? Can you stop yourself from striking out at people because of your pain and instead “encourage yourself in the Lord?”