I'm Sorry Mom

It has been a while since I've written something, but I wrote this after a night of drinking. I feel like it's good enough to be read and criticized, I hope you enjoy it.

I think my mom's mad at me. I killed a man yesterday. I didn't see anything wrong with it; the man had no soul, he was just a moving body. He had become a rag-doll for the public, nothing more than a tool. I saw no point in him living anymore, I mean he wasn't alive to begin with. The connection he had to the universe was severed, and, in turn, no longer belonged here. Everyday he focused on feeding his body's needs, but, never his own. He became too focused on trying to LIVE, he forgot to be human.

Now don't get me wrong, prior to yesterday, I had no reason to kill the man. Although his soul was weak, it was still there, alive and trying to become the host again to the disgusting self sufficient body it lived in. I had no right to kill a living-being, but, yesterday, when I looked him in the eyes, I saw nothing.  His eyes were empty, as if the soul had given up trying to live. Once I saw that, I became scared. I pleaded to the man to not give up, but, he couldn't hear me anymore. It was as if I was talking to a moving car with no driver. As much as I could plead to a car to stop, it's in no control to stop itself. I knew keeping him alive would be too dangerous, for others and his own self. So, as a result, I killed him. I killed him with no remorse, for  this world doesn't need a soulless body to continue living.

I'm sorry mom.

-Him

Reviews

[Amy Winder]

I like the conflicted morality, it's very interesting. Your character switches quite extremely from stating that they had to kill the man to that had no right to kill someone to that they had no remorse, if you redraft you might want to think about making this less extreme or giving an indication of the way your character move between these opinions.

[A. Amos]

Interesting piece and I truly enjoyed the read...

[Cavins Indiana]

Curious whether you've ever tried this as a poem. It almost has that feel.

[Readingforthemind]

Very moving. It is an very excellent piece of literature. I like how it ties with the world around us or it could apply to conflict: Man Vs Self