There once was a girl...

You'll probably think me insane after reading this... And you're probably right.

There once was a girl. She was hated by everyone. She felt as though no one could love her. As if she were too ugly, too fat, too stupid, too depressed. Everyone told her that she was beautiful, that she was at a normal weight, that she was smart, that she chose to be depressed. But she didn’t believe them. Why would she?

            There once was girl. Every day she would put on a mask. She acted as if she were happy, as if everything was fine. But it wasn’t nothing was fine. She wasn’t happy. If they really cared, they would have seen that. But they didn’t care, so they didn’t see. They didn’t love her. Why should they, there was nothing to love within this pathetic excuse for a being.

            There once was a girl. She tried to take her own life. But she couldn’t, she was too weak to kill herself. Another reason she didn’t deserve to live. She was afraid to die. She didn’t want to feel the pain that came with death. She knew that no one would be sad, that they probably wouldn’t even have a funeral. Why waste the money. I mean it wasn’t like anyone would come. It was just a waste of money. And in these times, you couldn’t waste money.

            There once was a girl. She had friends, but they didn’t like her, they liked who she pretended to be. And for that she hated them. She wished they would all die. For everyday, even though they claimed to be her friend, they said the most hurtful things. They would say that she was stupid, that she was worthless, that she was a f*g, that she was going to hell. They were all true. But that doesn’t mean that they didn’t hurt. And the girl in response would say that one day she was going to snap. That one day she would loose her control and kill them all.

            There once was a girl who would kill everyone that had ever hurt her. The scary �"or was it sad- thing was that she was telling the truth. Of course she wouldn’t kill those who hadn’t hurt her. Only those that deserved to die would die. And of course, that would include her. As soon as she snapped, half the middle school would lie dead. All by her hand, and she would laugh. And the rest would cower. Thinking her mad and praying that they wouldn’t die too. Then the girl that had killed all those poor students, would raise the knife, and plunge it deep into her heart. She would do it over and over and over again until she died.  

There once was a girl. Who should be locked up in a mental institute with straightjacket keeping her from harming people. A girl hoping no one she knows is currently reading this, a girl who wants to die, but can’t bring herself to commit suicide, a girl with hundreds of different masks, a girl who just wants to be loved, a girl who has no real friends, a girl who isn’t loved, a girl who doesn’t deserve to be loved, a girl who doesn’t deserve anything but death. This girl is probably insane. And this girl is probably going to suffer in a mental institute. But all this girl really wants to do, is die. I’m sure you can guess who this girl is. But just in case you can’t, this girl is me.

Reviews

[A.Lee]

Wow. I can understand where you're coming from. I've been there and back over and over again. Writing is an excellent outlet. I can feel your pain seeping through your words. Keep writing. Don't stop.

[Jade (insanity)]

I really really liked this write. It was filled with so much emotion and pain. It was written very well and I liked it. I am sorry you feel this way and I do not think you are insane but may all be well and just keep writing.
Good write :]
-Jade

[Coyote Poetry]

A powerful story. It is hard sometime to see the good in a life. I put two brothers who kill themselves into graves and they left many to cry and heartbroken. One of my brother's left a baby who is now 20 years old. Life is a bear and we must find a peace. You are a talented writer with the possibility of great things. The story is sad and tells of disappointment and fear. Better to go out like a wild beast then to walk into hell with open arms. A excellent story. You made me think.
Coyote

[sera bela]

I don't think you are crazy at all. This is wonderful! keep up the great work!