Time

“Charge,” Daniel cried, running and waving his wooden sword. Before he could make contact with the attic wall, Daniel hastily stopped, his eyes squeezed shut. He heard a loud thud, and he wondered if he did, in fact, collide with the wall. Soon after that thought, Daniel heard the most peculiar sound of grunting, and he knew, that it was not him who ran in the wall, but it was Mister Cole, the old man living next door.

 

Daniel ran to the kitchen, swerving side to side in an attempt to avoid slipping on the strong scented liquid which was spread across the floors. His thoughts wandered to his old Neighbour, who was bloody and bruised from the fall, with no-one to assist him. Luckily, he had alerted his parents and they ran to Mister Cole’s aid. Daniel grabbed the ice-pack and raced back to the bedroom at top speed, not falling at all.

 

Daniel felt a wave of nausea hit him as he entered the room. He could smell the strong stench of blood lingering everywhere, making him want to vomit his breakfast. “Mother, here is the ice-pack,” Daniel muttered, afraid that if he opened his mouth too much, something bad would happen. He looked at the old man sprawled on the bed, his leg twisted at an odd angle and his face scrunched up in disgust. Mister Cole tried to say something, but his strength had betrayed him, and a long line of spit dribbled out of his mouth. At this sight, Daniel’s face had drained of colour, and as he opened his mouth, it seemed as if all the food he had ever eaten had escaped his body.

 

“Send him out, he’s a young boy, he shouldn’t see this,” Mister Cole said, his words were not clear, but everyone understood. “He is ten, Mister Cole, old enough to be here,” Daniel’s mother, Amelia, argued. Daniel looked down, his cheeks flushed as he felt the piercing gaze of the old man on him. “Just go home, do some homework, the maid is there so you will not be alone, now I have to clean your mess,” Amelia muttered. Daniel looked at her in confusion, unsure of what made her change her mind. Then, Mister Cole spoke, “Boy, come here.” Daniel nervously went near the old man, afraid that he would bite him with his yellow crooked teeth. “Thank you for coming, please visit me again.” Daniel hid his surprise, he nodded and gave Mister Cole a small smile.

 

“Mother, Father, what happened to Mister Cole,” Daniel asked when Amelia and his father, James, came home. “The old man is too stubborn to go to the hospital so the doctors are fixing him up in his disgusting house,” James explained. “Can I go see him tomorrow,” Daniel asked quietly, he was scared that his parents would refuse to let him go. “If you don’t vomit on his floors again,” Amelia laughed at her own joke, but then her face softened when she saw Daniel’s teary eyes, “you really want to go?” Daniel nodded slowly, “yes mother, I really want to go.”  

 

“And the red car went faster than the blue one,” Daniel explained, jumping up and down. Mister Cole laughed, “Son, I have never laughed this much.” Daniel smiled, giving his sickly neighbour a small hug, “I will see you tomorrow sir.” “Thank you,” Mister Cole said quietly.

 

‘Beep, Beep.’ Daniel grumbled and sat on his bed. He stared at the time on his analogue clock, trying to remember what he had to do. “Ah, yes, I have to see Mister Cole,” Daniel muttered. He looked around his house but no one was there, instead, he saw a parcel with a note on. “Daniel, take this bag to Mister Cole’s house as soon as you wake up, I will see you soon,” he read. Daniel grunted angrily, but he still took the bag to Mister Cole’s place.

 

“Happy thirteenth birthday,” A chorus of voices yelled as Daniel entered Mister Cole’s room. “Wha-a, oh, I forgot it was my birthday, Thank you everyone, that’s where you went mum and dad,” he mumbled “Open the parcel,” James prompted. Daniel opened the bag and pulled out a beautiful cake, “Wow, thank you everyone.” The day went by really quickly, Daniel was surrounded by love and presents. Suddenly, Mister Cole grabbed a tissue and coughed loudly. Daniel ran to his side and looked at the tissue, it was bloody. “No, mum, dad, there’s blood on his tissue,” he screamed, panicking. Mister Cole raised a finger, “No,” he groaned, “Daniel, alone.”

 

Daniel was sobbing into the old man’s shirt, “Please, not on my birthday,” he begged. Mister Cole looked at him apologetically, he grabbed a paper from his bedside table and gave it to Daniel. Mister Cole gave a weak smile and closed his eyes, not breathing anymore.

 

The funeral was small, hardly any of his relatives showed up. Daniel’s parents had decided to do the funeral in their neighbour’s backyard, as they did not have the heart to do it elsewhere. A few relatives were muttering things like, “he finally died.” Daniel furiously stomped away from the ceremony and opened the paper Mister Cole had given to him.

 

If you are reading this, then I am with the lord. Go back to my house and use this key to unlock my antique clock. What is inside, is yours.

 

Daniel grabbed the little key attached to the paper, and walked into his neighbour’s house. The chipped antique clock stood right next to the door. It was still working, but alas, Daniel thought, who would use it now? He studied the clock and found a small keyhole on the side. Daniel slipped the key in the latch and as a small door swung open, Daniel saw a gold box. He hastily opened the lid of the box and saw a green pocket watch with five words engraved on it:

 

Thank you for your time

Author's Note

Note my best writing, but I'd like to know what you think of it.

Reviews

[alanwgraham]

This is a very intriguing tale! I thought that your intro with Daniel running at the wall, stopping and then Mr Cole falling suggested that he had some kind of supernatural powers and that would be developed. There are a few small points that I thought seemed unlikely - that the doctors would fit up the old man at home if his leg was at a funny angle. Also it jumped from him being ten to thirteen without any mention of time passing. I like the conclusion but I think you would make it stronger with a little more work.
Well done - it shows great promise!
Alan
Perhaps you would like to read my story 'Serendip - the land of Jewels' about a lady my daughter met in Sri lanka just after the tsunami. (Its on the fourth page!)

[S_Writergirl]

Thank you! My story was actually written for a contest with a word limit of 1000 words, so I couldn't incorporate everything.

Sure, will do!