Perfect

 

no one said we had to be perfect

yet here I am

watching romantic indie films

with no narrative,

instrumental folk sound music,

& fucked up endings.

I’m drawing you again

before the light goes

& you’ve been crying

& we’ve just made love

& I heaved inside you

like an ocean

& your skin sang

like the mouth to the sea

 

no one said we had to be perfect

yet here we are

unable to drink this terrible coffee

unable to say anything worth saying

except good bye & thankyou.

& I’m drawing you again

(one last time)

you’ve never looked so

not-pretty before.

I imagine you’ve been crying

I imagine I left bruises

the kind no one sees

when you’ve loved too hard

like the love only cities know

as the architecture wails

against silhouettes of sleeping children.

 

no one said we had to be perfect

not like you were imperfect

yet perfectly so.

imperfect drawings over drawings

are all I have left of us, crowding my room.

drawings of you after we made love

languid and glowing

before the evening light escaped

and I mouthed in the darkness

you can go now, you have my heart.

 

Author's Note

needs a bit of work - comments and suggestions appreciated

Reviews

[TP LaRose]

I too, thought it was wonderful. I wouldn't change anything. That is the beauty of poetry, it is perfect in its imperfections. The words and emotions flow from us and magically appear on the paper before us, often without us even realizing it.
I know my favourite poems of mine are the ones that I can't help but write, that I scribble down on paper in a mad, urgent, fevered pitch. I don't even realize what exactly it is that I've written until I look back upon them.

Don't change a thing, unless it comes from a deep need within yourself, an overwhelming urge to create and add to what's already written. But hopefully if that is the case, you will create a new piece that is as beautiful as this one.
Thank you for sharing.........TP...Poetess

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

bit of work..come on..non!!..as the title this poem is perfect.So poignant and beautiful evoking a myriad of emotions..so wonderful,so very wonderful.

[Emily B]

I really came to the words again today to visit the painting. Your art and your art (words) are both astounding.

[Martin See]

it's perfect the way it is...don't change a thing...the imperfections of bruises, scars, stains, brokeness, randomness is what makes life beautiful...i've read a couple of your poems i enjoy this best...i appreciate the thought that went through the process that you must have took to write this poem...good on ya mate!

[Emily B]

I thought I came and read and commented here. I guess the computer ate it. Usually I compare your poetry to paintings. I see a lot of real resemblance there. This poem is a movie. A black and white home movie where the sound is muted and the motions seem to be out of time with reality. The kind we watch in the shadows of our rooms with a half a tear and a glass of wine. This is lovely and perfect and I hope you don't change it much.

[emmajoy]

Do NOT do anything with it... leave it as it is ... please

It flows a story, a reel of pictures, some black and white, some in colour... there's a sadness, there's a thankfulness and an awful lot of honesty in your words and you've melded them together into a story rather than a poem

'I'm drawing you again
before the light goes
& you've been crying
& we've just made love
& I heaved inside you
like an ocean
& your skin sang
like the mouth to the sea'

See that has the meter of a poem and yet is a short emotional, candid story

Thank you for sharing yet again.