Echoes

Echoes

A Poem by Skylar Valentine
"

A simple poetry about fading love.

"

Echoes

2014 SkylarValentine



Hush now Love. You're holding the flame too close.

Isn't our love enough? What am I missing?


Your brown eyes have gone astray.

Are you hearing the words I say?

Tell me we'll be okay-

are you even listening?


I burn as the doubt draws near.

It's not the flame I fear,

but what's tearing you from here,

and what we'll be losing.


Ensnare me with every lie

that echoes our love's goodbye.

Until you're too tired to try

and I'm barely breathing.


Hush now Love. You're holding the flame too close.

Wasn't our love enough? What am I missing?

© 2014 Skylar Valentine


Author's Note

Skylar Valentine
Overall impressions and thoughts.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Simply Beautiful I love it!


Loved this Stanza's lines.




Ensnare me with every lie

that echoes our love's goodbye.

Until you're too tired to try

and I'm barely breathing.




Hush now Love. You're holding the flame too close.

Wasn't our love enough? What am I missing?


Thank you for sharing. blessings. kindred poet

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Skylar Valentine

8 Years Ago

I'm happy you enjoyed it :)
Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet

8 Years Ago

you're very welcome. blessings. kindred poet




Reviews

I love this write, it was sweet, yet a sense of slight desperation was seeping through as I read, I especially love how you began and ended this piece the same, the lines are very powerful. You have done a great job with your wording, the rhyming and the imagery. Love it!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hm. I like it. Been there.

I quite enjoyed,

'I burn as the doubt draws near.
It's not the flame I fear,
but what's tearing you from here,
and what we'll be losing.'

To me it speaks to the tension of losing someone you love. You love them so much, but they're fading away, and all you can do is 'burn' with passion for them. and you're willing to do anything, even get hurt, if it means you won't lose them.

Also, I saw a parrallel between love and lies which immediately made me think of sonnet 138 by Shakespeare,

'therefore I lie with her, and she with me,
And in our faults by lies we flattered be.'

Good work :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Skylar Valentine

8 Years Ago

You seemed to draw everything from it I was trying to express :D always a good sign. Thank you for t.. read more
Trevor Bergshoeff

8 Years Ago

My pleasure :). Keep up the good work.
I truly enjoyed the read, elegantly crafted...

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great structure, rhyme scheme, parallel repetition.
I like the concept, especially clarifying what it is you fear.

I joined your group because of the name and you clearly put thought into the description. Hope it does well.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Skylar Valentine

8 Years Ago

Thank you for the comment, and checking out my group :)
this is such a gentle and beautiful poem, and its well written. i like this poem a lot

Posted 8 Years Ago


I really like this. It was beautifully written.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Simply Beautiful I love it!


Loved this Stanza's lines.




Ensnare me with every lie

that echoes our love's goodbye.

Until you're too tired to try

and I'm barely breathing.




Hush now Love. You're holding the flame too close.

Wasn't our love enough? What am I missing?


Thank you for sharing. blessings. kindred poet

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Skylar Valentine

8 Years Ago

I'm happy you enjoyed it :)
Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet

8 Years Ago

you're very welcome. blessings. kindred poet


Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

278 Views
7 Reviews
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on May 3, 2014
Last Updated on May 3, 2014
Tags: echoes, love, lie, gone, flame, missing

Author

Skylar Valentine
Skylar Valentine

Killen, TX



About
A ᴡʀɪᴛᴇʀ ᴏғ ғᴀɴᴛᴀsʏ, ᴀᴅᴠᴇɴᴛᴜʀᴇ, ᴍʏsᴛᴇʀ.. more..

Writing