Im lost

A Story by Sm161098

This is a fictional story about an adopted girl Daisy who suffers depression and thinks she meets the love of her life Kyle. This story may be sensitive to some people so read with caution.

Chapter one
The room was silent, darkness was turning to light, I awake from my sleep in a very familiar white room. Bars stopped the windows from opening and white doors locked us inside.
You may be wondering who I am, where I am and how I ended up here, well it’s a long story. For a start my name is Daisy, I ended up in an asylum, you know for crazy or unwell people. I wasn’t always like this, or as far as I can remember I was never like this. I used to awake in my pink room that I hated but never the less it was my house and ‘home’, here isn’t home but its closer than anything to a home. My home was always filled with laughter and happiness… until I showed up at least that is what I was always told. Originally I lived in an adoption centre, I was left out on their door step when I was a few months old, for seven years I lived there waiting to find a home, no one wanted me, no wonder though I was never the smartest, and I knew nothing of the real world. My days were spent with my buddy Kyle, he too got abandoned and kicked to the side. We would spend all day playing with Lego, drawing and being creative. Soon everything changed before I turned seven Kyle got adopted and got took away from me, soon after a family started taking an interest in me apparently I was ‘different’, so time went passed and soon after my seventh I finally found a home, it was defining tally a different experience. I only had one sibling, a younger brother he was three when I was seven. I hated the new atmosphere, I was only a kid and I hated the unknown and all I knew was the adoption centre. A year passed and I still hated it, I hated my family, they never allowed me to do anything I wanted to do, I liked painting and being messy and my parents hated that, even my four-year-old brother wasn’t able to make a mess. I would often yell at them for not allowing me to do anything and at night I would always hear my parents talk about my ‘problems’ and why they adopted me but I never listened for long enough to find out.
Soon enough before I knew it I turned twelve and I started academy and I was nervous like any kid but unlike any kid I cried the full day and had to be removed from the school and I got transferred to a different school, my parents said my problems stopped me learning in school so they sent me to a ‘special’ school. Every day I took different pills, one for my anger, one for anxiety and one for depression,The list continues… the doctors said it would help. Turns out at a young age I was diagnosed with depression, anger issues and slight dyslexia that stopped me at times. My parents adopted me hoping that they could help with the situation.
To be honest my parents made it worse, they made me anxious to go to school because they expected me to do well and get good grades. They made my depression worse by pressuring me and not allowing me to do the things that I enjoyed. Anyway when I got transferred school that allowed me to learn and be me, something I was never able to do anywhere else, sadly I couldn’t stay there forever my parents soon took me out and I couldn’t ‘study’ there as they found it childish and they felt I wasn’t being taught anything. So by the age of thirteen I had depression worse than before, and I started to self-harm, it honesty just made things worse but I continued as it was my only escape from reality.
Usually every day I sat in my bedroom. Alone. I would listen to music on full volume, blasting it through the house while my parents were working and when my brother was at school. My parents would receive noise complaints all the time when they came home from work, it got so bad that my parents sound proofed my bedroom and they locked me in the house all day with things to do, they usually left a note for me to make dinner for the them coming home, to clean the house and do any house work that needed to be done. Basically I went from their child to their slave and maid. My parents say it was to stop me from making a noise and to have something to do than sitting around doing nothing.
Soon enough I was sixteen, I done the house work, I made dinner, I got made to get groceries …. At least when I came home I still had my pink room and a blue bunk bed to sleep in. Slowly the memories of that happy and excited couple that first came to see me faded away and became a faint memory. So I at this point I had no family and basically no friends, the last friend I spoke to was Kyle and that was when I was twelve and when we still contacted each other, every now and then I check his Facebook page, he always looks so happy in his photos, he was the only person to make me smile. Sometimes I wonder if he fakes a smile because I know I do. I pretend everything is okay when it’s not …
When I was seventeen it was still the same old rubbish but something changed, my parents split up and I went crazy, I couldn’t cope. It was agreed that I couldn’t stay with either of my parents as I was a ‘danger’ to those around me. That’s how I ended up here at the asylum and everything else that’s happened. I remember the car trip there, my mother silent. Me, I was cradling myself and trying not to cry. Half way there my mother decided to talk, she told me she regretted adopting me and she regrets everything to help me. I ignored every word she said until she told me to speak and to stop ignoring her so I did exactly that, I slapped her while screaming everything that her and my father put me through. She continued to drive and left me at the gates of ‘blackwood asylum’, as she drove off I hoped for a better life, when I arrived though I missed home despite everything. I only missed my fake roses and the lavender smell when you walked into my bedroom.
The first night here was rough, they let me keep my phone though to listen to music as it made me calmer. During the first night I decided to share everything with Kyle although we hadn’t spoken in a while, I wasn’t really expecting a reply from him… little did I know he was in the room next to me but I will get to that soon. When I messaged him he said he was in the asylum visiting, so the next day I seen him and we spoke all day, it was good to see his face again. Later that night I got an unexpected message from him saying that he lied to me and he was in the asylum as a patient. He told me his family abused him and so he is now physically and emotionally scarred by it, he isn’t here because he’s crazy he is here because he needs help. I always knew he had a fake smile, in those family photos. It was obvious to me, i could tell a fake smile anywhere as i had one on my face for as long as i could remember. Kyle told me that he tried to contact me during the years that we were apart but his parents would beat him if he touched a phone or a laptop. He shared everything with me, he told me that when he was first adopted his parents were loving and gave him everything, it was only after his parents started drinking alcohol that it all started. He told me when he turned eleven his parents constantly argued, they drank alcohol to take stress away, they usually took their anger out on him. It was unfair to kyle he never done anything to deserve what he went through, to be honest does anyone deserve anything in this world Here in the asylum kyle gets help to recover from the physical and emotional scars that his parents left behind.
We helped each other out a lot during our time together at the asylum,we became close friends through the years. we eventually after two years of being friends in the asylum we became boyfriend and girlfriend. We fell in love. Today I turn twenty years old, I no longer have severe depression, its still there and probably will be but im getting better. Last year I started studying part time at college to try help me come back into society, the doctors said it would help sustain my progress. I got out of the asylum on February the second, that day was special to me as it also marked mine and kyles one-year anniversary of being a couple. Kyle got released the day before me, his doctors helped him find a nice two-bedroom house for me and him to live in.
when I got out i went to study full time and started to help those like me who have problems and need help because no child or adult should go through what I went through. I’m just glad that I got help before it was too late because who knows what would have happened, I would most likely still have problems and be self-harming, it’s not the best thing to resort to. If you have a problem speak to someone, or if you know someone with problems speak to them because some people are not as lucky as me. I have an amazing boyfriend, and I now can’t wait to experience life. Live and love life while you can. When i got out I couldn't wait to see what the future held for me...

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