June part one

A Story by Stirling

June 15 1996 the date I died well more like the date I choose to. My parents didn’t like my “lifestyle” and neither did the people at high school, consent bullying and fighting at school only to be yelled at by parents and family when at home, “if you didn’t want to be bullied at school you wouldn’t have chosen this lifestyle!!” they’d yell every time I fought back, “choose this f*****g lifestyle?!” I’d yell back “why would I choose being bullied at school and home, by my family and parents when I got home?! You can’t even say what I am! I’m a f*****g lesbian and I was f*****g born like this! It wasn’t a choice to suddenly like other girls I always did!”. This would happen every night and they’d send me to my room every night but this night I didn’t come back out and never would again, at least alive anyway.

It wasn’t as painful as I thought it was, I had someone sleeping pills that I’ve been taking for my sleeping problems and anxiety, it was just like going to sleep then waking up again, just a bit colder then normal. There was no hell or heaven I was still here even though my parents and family would say it was a sin to be gay and to commit suicide, jokes on them huh? I’m still here, as a spirit? Or ghost I guess? I’ve never really believed in them myself but look at me now.

On my tombstone it said “June, beloved daughter, taken too soon”. Beloved f*****g daughter, do you believe that?? They f*****g hated me, they were happy I was gone, that their mistake was erased. Less then a week after I was gone they moved, they didn’t even tell the school or anyone what happened, that was over 21 years ago and I’m still here, no one has lived here since, until today.

It’s June 26 2017, and a family is moving in, a mother, father, two twin boys about 8 years old and a girl, my age. I saw them getting out of the moving van, and the girl was beautiful, I couldn’t take my eyes off her as she got out the van. She looked straight up to the window I was looking out, right into my eyes, “s**t!” I yelled ducking down but then realizing I’m still a ghost and thinking there’s no way she saw me.

They’re inside now, I can hear the parents talking about ordering dinner because they’re tired and can hear the two boys screaming and running around the house, can see way they’re be tired. Suddenly I can hear footsteps stop outside my room and the door unlock, it slowly opens, and there she is, I was frozen, thinking that I should move but I couldn’t, a ghost being shocked by a living person, could you imagine?

“I’m taking this room” she yelled down the stairs. I jumped back to my senses when she did and hid thinking she could See Me knowing well that she couldn’t, at least that’s what I thought at first. She walked up to the window, looking out then back in and around the room, “I swear I saw something” she whispered. “F**k!” I thought “did she somehow See Me?”. She walks around the room, around all the boxes that were brought in the day before, she sits on the bed “I must just be tired” she says to herself “maybe I should have a nap till dinner is here”. She lays back on the bed and starts playing some music over her phone and drifts off.

Suddenly I’m not in my house, or anywhere I’ve been before, I’m in a field of green grass, I’ve never seen such green. “is this I dream?” I say to myself “can ghost even dream?”. “what do you mean can ghost dream?” I feel frozen as I hear a voice from behind me, “hey turn around so I can see you please” the voice says again, “have I finally moved on?” I think to myself, I turn around and see, her! The girl that just moved into my house, well their house now, laying in the grass looking up at me, “so who are you” she says looking up at me “uhh y-you can see me?” I stumbled, “well obviously or I wouldn’t be talking to you” she says pushing hair out of her eyes “so what’s your name?” she asks, “oh uhh it’s june” I haven’t said my own name in years let alone talked to anyone. “ohh I love that name, just like the month!” she says sitting up and holding out her hand “I’m Jess, nice to meet you!” she says with a beautiful smile on her face, “uh nice to meet you too jess” I taking her hand, and I can actually feel it! “are you ok?” she says looking up at me “you kinda look Surprised and you’ve been holding my hand kinda long haha” she laughs, “oh oh uh” I stumbled and let go quickly and take a step back “i-im sorry I haven’t talked to anyone in awhile”, Jess lays back down in the grass making a motion to sit next to her “come lay down with me, the grass feels so soft”. I slowly sit down next to her unsure what will happen or what to say next, but before I can say anything she looks up at me again “so was that you in the window when I got out of the van?” I froze then quickly looked at her “y-you saw me??” stumbling again “i-i didn’t think anyone could”. She sits up again “I couldn’t see you at first but it felt like someone was watching me and after a few seconds looking at the window you�"” suddenly she was gone and I was back in the house and could hear her mother knocking on the door saying the food is here, “OK coming” Jess says getting out of bed and looking around “I’ll see you later june” she whispers and leaves the room.

“oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!” I say walking back and forth in the room “she can See Me! I how can she?? And what was that place?? Was it her dream?? How’d I get there and how was it possible??” my head is exploding with so many questions right now, what does it all mean?

An hour passes though it feels a lot longer with all the questions, and the door opens again and there she is again. She walks in and closes the door and starts looking through the boxes “found it” she exclaims. She pulls out a book covered in stickers from all over the place, “Jess’s dream book and love” it says on the cover. I look inside the box and it’s full of books about dreams and how to lucid dream. “so that’s what it must have been” I think to myself.

Jess sits down on her bed and opens her book and starts to write “June 26 2017, I had a strange dream today when we finally moved in, I was laying in a field of such brilliant green grass and then suddenly a girl appears next to me, I know I was lucid dreaming again but I didn’t dream of her so I was surprised, I asked her to turn who she was and she got so surprised that I could see her and when I asked her name and shook her hand she looked even more surprised, her name was June by the way, just like this month! Then I remembered seeing her for a second in the window when getting here, she must be a ghost! I hope I can see her again when I sleep again, she was very pretty but looked sad, I wonder what happened to her… Anyway that’s all for now dream book, I will write in you more in the morning and if I see her again, good night!” jess puts the book back into the box and lays back in bed and start’s listening to music again.

“so it really was a dream, I mean it was her dream but still” I think to myself “and she was able to See Me for a second in the window! And she knows I’m a ghost! A-and she thinks I’m pretty?? But I look sad too, I can’t remember how I look, it’s been so long and I can’t see myself in a reflection anymore…” I turn to look at her laying in bed listening to music “she’s so pretty too”.

A few hours pass and suddenly I’m back in the green field again but this time the sky is full of stars “hey june!!” I hear again behind me “turn around and look at this!” it’s Jess again! I quickly turn around this time and there’s a huge stage with a band playing a song I’ve never heard before. “this is my favorite band” Jess says “come watch them with me” I go over and sit next to her, “they are pretty good” I say “the best she says” her eyes wide as she watches them “a lot of people love them, they sing a lot about freedom and being free to love whoever you want and about being free to be whoever you want”. I look at her “love whoever and be whoever you want?” I ask her “yeah, like being free to be gay, lesbian, trans, bi, anything you want to be without people judging or hating you” I look back up at the band “t-they can sing about that kind of thing and no one hates them?” I say. “of course they can” Jess says “well mostly, lots of people still hate us, but a lot are more accepting these days but still is a lot of hate” I look back at her “us?” I say “ohh yeah, yeah I well, I’m gay, well I mean I don’t like guys just girls” she says it like its nothing and looks at me “you don’t mind that do you?” she asks “n-no of course I don’t mind, I’m just surprised people can accept that now, back when I was, well you know, I didn’t feel accepted” I look away “my parents and family didn’t accept me, they didn’t like my "lifestyle” and hated the way I was born, so I couldn’t take being around them and one day I took my own life and now I’m here, not moving on" I look back to her and she’s starting at me, s**t did I say something wrong. “i-im sorry, I made this depressing didn’t I?” I say. Suddenly she hugs me “I’m so so sorry” she says hugging me, it’s the first time anyone has hugged me, “I didn’t know” she says “no no its OK, how could have you” I say putting my arms around her too.

“so uhh come here often?” I jokingly say trying to lighten up the mood “haha no never here” she laughs as we let each other go “I normally lucid dream but it’s normally some place I’ve been, I’ve never seen this place before, I wonder where or what it is” she says looking around, “have you seen this place before?” she ask “no, I’ve no idea, I’ve never been here before or even slept since becoming a ghost” as I look around too “the first time I’ve been here was when we first met and I didn’t even think I could dream” I say “well that doesn’t matter right now, we can figure it out in the next Dream” she Says looking back at the Band “let’s just enjoy this now and think about it later”. We sit together for what feels like hours listening to the band and all other kinds of music, “I think I like this band the most” I think to myself.

End of part one.