Miguel

The fourth entry

I'm aware that the last words of Chara's journal entry were confusing and seemed to be out of nowhere, and I am here to give you, reader, a proper explanation of why Chara seems to have so much acumulated anger and sadness. But without going into excrutiating detail, to not invade my friend's privacy.

   He is a complicated and tormented man, oftenly passing through atacks, he laughs histericly, yells in rage, cries for hours, or all at the same time. That was what he went through last night, while he wrote his journal entry. I had to go into his room and hold him until he calmed down, I wrap my arms tightly around him and rock our bodies back and forth slowly. ''Don't worry, it's a safe place here...don't be afraid to let go'' I quietly mumbled to him phrases like that to help him relax. It's only fair for me to help him when he helped me so many times before, when I get overstimulated by noises, smells, crowds, etc...

    We called his therapist after that, he spend a whole hour talking on the phone with her. I'm worried about him, i'm always worried, he acts so laid back, outgoing, sarcastic and playfull, I get afraid that he will burry his true feelings, he suffered so  much, I was there through everything, maybe I could have done more? What if I could have spared him from some of it? Oh my dear friend, please forgive me for all I din't do for you, but I hope you know you can count on me for the rest of our lives.

    You are the best of all, you have always been. It's tragic to me how much you suffer with yourself when you look at the mirror, because at my eyes you are amazing. Even if it's hard for me to show. 

I hope that now, everything it's clear.

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   He is better by now, he's on my side watching the Bad Boys trilogy again, to get his mood up, He suggested for me to write another case down while he can't think properly. I decided to pick a fresh case, that we solved a few weeks ago. And it remembers me of how Chara's emotions can have extreme oposites.

  The local news channel had announced an increase of the underground organ traffic activity, a tragic new, of course, people were getting more and more afraid to leave home, especially to let their kids leave home, even for school or to play with friends. And of course we would get contacted on a situation like this, by many people actually, even to help the police with the investigation, and of course, we had to do something to help. Chara was even more determinated than me. 

   We started by searching the most dangerous areas in the city, they were especially located in downtown. I have to say, these places have a heavy aura, I don't know how to understand, but it's sad to look at all those people in awfull conditions, hunger, thirst, pain, and in terrible danger, I was quiet most of the time, but Chara din't seem affected, and that worried me, he was talkative as always, investigating everything we could. And after hours of searching, we found the main place where it all happend, and the reason why it was happend was even more horrible.

   It was for the money, to sell on the black market, of course, but the main trafficant, the one who was keeping the flow of it going, whose name remains anonymus for the media, was doing it to save his daughter, all because of their living conditions, if you could call that living, the place was falling apart, dirt all around, smell or urine and blood filled the air, the trafficant was arrested, as they should, after all, they did an unforgiving crime, independent of the reasons why. Me and Chara paid for their daughter's treatment, and the area affected went back to the normal.

    And as always, Chara got pissed at the situation, how can someone get to such a state, where they resort to such metods to their, or their loved ones' survival? How can the sistem allow this? how? It wasn't supposed to happend. I still wonder, they searched for help, and it was denied? how exactly? And why would they? 

*******

 

forgive me for not giving further detail about the case, you must understand it's a heavy case, and we preffer to keep most of it confidently. We see and hear all kind of things as private detectives, one day, we would experience all of that.