Another Chance

Until this moment I never understood how you miss someone you never had

“Another Chance”

Fifteen years of my existence

I never heard of you

Fifteen years of my existence

I’ve never seen your shadow

Fifteen years of my existence

I never get to know you

 

I was surprised when I hear about you

I never thought that I came from you

For all these years my life was just a lie

Maybe that’s the reason why I feel empty inside

 

The time has come that I will finally see you

It’s the most awkward scene that ever happen

Even though it was only on screen

I can’t describe my feelings when I look at you

Tears flow down to your cheeks as you whisper my real name

I can’t say anything because right now my heart is full of anger and pain

 

You were talking to me

Asking questions that a father like should be

My ears are open listening to your voice

But my heart is close and it is not my choice

 

Two weeks had passed

Since I’ve discover that you’d exist

I was looking forward to finally meet you in person

You promised me that you will do anything

Just for the reason that I can go back into your arms again

 

I don’t know why but I feel happy and excited

At last we will be united

I will prepare my mind and heart in opening up to you

I also wrote down the questions that I will ask you

 

The day has come and I will be able to hold you

I was so nervous if what I will address you

“Mr.? Sir?” I really don’t know

But why is life so unfair to me?

My hopes are gone and fade away

As I listen to someone saying that you already passed away

 

I hold my chest as my heart aches

A smile in my face suddenly fakes

What is this, I feel like crying

I sat on the ground and feel like dying

 

 

My mind is blank

I can’t think of anything

I was only staring at my ceiling

Suddenly, someone send a message to me

As I open it, tears came crushing my face

It was a video of my father and me when I was still a baby

He was holding me so gently and I can see that he really does love me

 

Now I really feel the pain,

The pain of losing someone you never had

I feel like I’m in a fathomless agony

My life is full of irony and mystery

 

If I could steal another chance

The first thing I would do is call him “Dad”

I will hug him so tight and I will tell him how much I love him

Even though I never had him in my life

 

If I could just have another chance

I will love to spent time with him

To cover up the times that we loss

Those fifteen birthdays, fifteen Christmas, and fifteen new years

 

 

Oh! How I wish to have another chance

I wanted to get to know him

And ask why did he left me behind again

Right now, I just really miss him

Like I’m missing him for the past fifteen years of my existence