Perfection - Mesa Verde

a bit of flash fiction for your entertainment

So I'm 46 years old and mostly inert, hauling my bulk down this series of tarred switchbacks designed to make the hike less stressful on a body. As if walruses were ever capable of a two mile sojourn at ten thousand feet above their watery world. The path is well traveled this afternoon. I exchange pleasant nods between gasps for air with family groups and couples all the while telling myself - as far as you travel downward, you will return upward. I stop for a moment under the shade of jutting sandstone and scrappy pinon while a mother flanked by three small children gives a nature lesson on a crawling caterpillar. Two mezmerized girls recoil as thier younger sibling dispatches the furry creature with a well placed stomp.
"Oh my God. You are so getting a time out."
I took a long swallow of bottled water to stop the giggles as I continued down the trail that soon widened out at the base of the ruins. The sloping cliff side echoed with the quiet conversations of tourists. Forest green clad rangers stood sentinel in strategic spots along the ruins - chasing the more adventurous from the "no visitors beyond this point" and "please stay off the walls' signs. A steady stream of people popped in and out of one of the working kivas and I found that familiar ache rising from within. That cry for solace amongst the chattering humanity. The drone of life oblivious to the pain and joy of people thousands of years gone. Standing where we pose for pictures...I took a breath and turned away from Spruce House...and there it was. That place where earth and air and spirit meet. The sloping cuesta melted soft and verdant into the tourmaline horizon. Two ravens danced on thermals overhead, pinioned wings gliding a breath away from each other. The air itself was cool and clean and laced with spruce and yucca flower. I ran my hand along the weathered stones at my back and sent a single word prayer skyward.....perfection.....

Reviews

[M.D Leon]

this piece serves as a paintbrush on a blank canvas, with the excellent imagery and emotional manipulation it paints a picture of solace and peace if not sadness at the same instance. Given the use of imagery i would say its a very rhetorical piece but it infuses an idea into the readers mind, excellent!

[Nautili]

Very nice. Amidst the visitors and clamour of a tourist site, you found what your spirit was looking for, a respite from being earthbound. The caterpillar stomp was so indicative of how we feel sometime- we want to break out of our planned lives and just smash the very thing that is being set forth as so wonderful. HA!

[Bard Constantine]

The hiking experience recounted in in poetic prose. Delightful to share in the experience...

[An Ordinary Woman]

ravens dancing on thermals overhead...hiking along, nodding at others we meet along the path....a very descriptive write and fun, it's good to read you again!

[Wolfwind Words]

The tapestry of images has been painted and you have taken us into your moments in time. This was wonderful! I could just imagine the kid stomping on the caterpillar and the subsequent reactions. The vista so peaceful and serene as you take us through your eyes and pull us in. A great journey to be a part of.

Great Ink!
Wolfie

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I enjoyed this sweet lady....an intriguing read...LOVED the part about the catepillar... (tee-hee)...oh well, there is a time to squash and a time to admire...it's easy to get them confused in a child's mind. lol The spider at the backdoor as I entered (as big as a silver dollar) was a "time to squash" (before he came inside) but the ones hanging from webs outside are safe from the toe of my boot (for now). This was a wow sentence, "The sloping cuesta melted soft and verdant into the tourmaline horizon." WOW. That will put them to practicing on those word-a-day calenders. lol I do crosswords myself. ;o) Always a pleasure to read your words. High marks as usual.

[Jibey]

You created a vivid scene, with the mother busy about her teaching role... the fussy rangers and then the calm and connection of the final sceen... 'Two ravens danced on thermals overhead, pinioned wings gliding a breath away from each other. The air itself was cool and clean and laced with spruce and yucca flower.' A place from which to draw deeply - which you did... Thank you