Enid parts the curtains and peeps out at the sky and the coal wharf
over the road where coal men are loading up the coal trucks and lorries
she can hear her father's loud voice from another room she blinks at the
sound the sky looks blue and a sun is coming over the railway bridge so
maybe ok to go out and see if Benny is around and what he's doing today
but her father's bark of a voice makes her shudder her mother's screech
rides on the air over her father's bark in a kind of operatic duet she
closes the curtains and sits on her bed waiting for the row to subside
and hopes it will not overrun into her room and bring her into the
firing line as it did sometimes she caresses her body in a way no one
else does or will her ears on the alert for sounds coming nearer she
gets up and goes to the bedroom door and listens the voices are still in
duet but softer now but more bitter then a thump thump sound a scream
and cry and Enid moves back from the door and her eyes wide open she
stares at the door as if at any moment it will explode inwards and her
father come in on her in a spiteful rage she moves to the wall by the
window and stands there waiting sensing her stomach rumbling with hunger
needing feeding but she daren’t yet go out to the kitchen and the
bruises on her arm and body have only just begun to fade from last time
she creeps along to her bed and climbs in between the sheets and fakes
to sleep maybe then he'll not disturb a roar of words explodes from the
passage and a screaming voice counterpoints then silence and door slams
and then whimpering then silence then a radio comes on music replaces
whimpering and roaring voices she sits up on the side of the bed and
listens intently her stomach rumbles her breathing she notices is heavy
her pulse is racing along she can sense it as she holds her wrist
between fingers she gets up and walks slowly to her bedroom door and
opens it cautiously and peers out along the passageway the radio is
playing music her mother is singing along to it in a slightly croaky
voice Enid walks down the passage and into the kitchen where a light
bulb shows a messiness of plates and cups and saucers and a frying pan
on the grimy stove she looks in the larder and takes out a box of cereal
and taking a bowl from the shelf she fills the bowl up with cereal and
pours in some milk she looks for a spoon and for the sugar tin you've
got up then? her mother says standing at the kitchen door a cigarette
between lips a bruise on her cheek Enid stares and nods about time at
least you were out of his way God he was in a foul mood this morning her
mother says moving into the kitchen the smoke from the cigarette
following her into the kitchen and making Enid's eyes watery get your
breakfast and best be out in case he's home lunch time and still in a
mood her mother says Enid puts a spoonful of sugar over the cereal and
goes into the sitting room her hand shaking she trying to keep the bowl
steady and sits at the dining table listening to the music on the radio
behind her she looks out the window through the net curtains at the
railway bridge and out onto Rockingham Street and the beginning of Bath
Terrace her mother enters the room a cup of tea on a saucer in her hand
the smoke about her head and sits opposite Enid deep in thought rubbing
the bruise on her cheek Enid wants to ask what was wrong with her father
and why was he in such a mood but she doesn't she just eats in silence
looking now and then at her mother's face and the bruise spreading there
and the music seems too happy for the occasion and she wishes it wasn't
on but she listens all the same don't annoy him when he gets home her
mother says try and keep out of his way Enid looks at the cereal bowl
the pattern of flowers around the outer rim what's up with Dad? she asks
her spoon half way to her mouth short of money says I waste it says I
don't know how to save her mother says looking out the window her eyes
watery red the cigarette shaking between fingers Enid wants to go to hug
her mother but doesn't in case her mother has bruises where Enid can't
see says I spoil you too much her mother went on looking at her her eyes
hollow and deep Enid says nothing but spoons the cereal into her mouth
and stares at the tablecloth with its blue pattern her mother's words
now drone on and Enid tries to shut them out and think of later and
seeing Benny and talking to him he knows what she has to put up with he
knows and he'll take her some place and she can forget for a while what
has happened at home maybe they'll go to the park and ride the swings
and slide or go on a bomb site and Benny collect stones for his catapult
can I go out with Benny? she asks her mother breaking into her mother's
monologue of woe yes I expect so her mother says tiredly but don't let
your father see you with him you know your father doesn't like him or
you being with him Enid nods and finishes her cereal and takes her bowl
to the kitchen and washes the bowl and spoon under the cold water tap
until clean and puts them on the draining board to dry catching sight of
her father's shadow out of the corner of her eye.