UNEASY NIGHT 1957

A BOY AND GIRL AND HER FATHER IN LONDON IN 1957

Enid and I sit
on the concrete stairs
of the flats

it's late afternoon
we'd played chess
and then decided
to come out
and sit on the stairs
before she had to go
home upstairs
to the flat above
before her old man
got home from work

she looks at her hands
in her lap

do you think
he'll be nice still?

who?
I ask

my dad
or will he
be his old self
and wallop me
for being here with you?

I look out by the wall
of the stairs
into the Square

kids are playing
on the pram sheds
some on scooters
riding around

have to see
won't you
I say

I like it when he's nice
like he has been
but it unnerves me
in case he goes back
to being as he was before

she looks at me

best get home
before he gets home
in case
he sees me here
she says

ok
I say

she stands up
and turns to go
when she stops
and looks back
at the stairs

so this
is where you go
her old man says
coming up the stairs
from below

just talking
she says nervously

talking is good
he says
my job relies
on me talking
and selling cars
he adds

he looks at me
isn't it good
Benny Boy talking?

yes it is
although it says
in the Bible
a time to talk
and a time to cease
from talking
or something like that
I say

he nods
yes that's it Enid
a time for all things

she looks at him
her eyes behind
her glasses
large
and nods

well don't
be too long here
Mum'll be getting dinner
on the table soon

and he smiles
and she freezes
in case it's a trick
and he'll lash
at her suddenly

but he doesn't
he climbs the stairs
and begins to whistle

and she looks at me
and her eyes have tears
edging on the rims

I watch her
and see she's uncertain
of where she is
or why he's changed
and will he go back
to as he was before

and she goes upstairs
and waves her small hand
and I wave back and
wait until she's gone
then go back indoors
for dinner and hope
she'll be all right
and sleep safely
in her uneasy night.

Author's Note

PHOTO BY COLIN O'BRIEN