FEELING GLAD 1958

A BOY AND GIRL IN LONDON IN 1958

I open the door
to my parents' flat
and Lydia's there
looking over the balcony

gazing down into the Square
she turns and says
I can go
to the cinema with you

mind you it took
a bit of persuasion
to convince Mum
I was best

out of her way today
as my dad came home
last night drunk
and singing to her

and my big sister's
in a mood and wants
her Spiv boyfriend back
despite having

one awful row
and so she said
yes get out
of the madhouse

so here I am
I close the door
behind me
and stand next to her

on the balcony
looking down
at the sights below
good

I say
taking in her grey-flowered dress
faded pattern
white ankle socks

and the plimsolls
she always wears
come rain or shine
so what did

your old man sing then?
I ask
Irish song I think
I was trying to sleep

so didn't try
to understand the words
Mum was hush-hushing him
and then he wanted to dance

with her along the passageway
and she's telling to shut up
and he sings louder
and my big sister

moaned in her sleep
about that Spiv boyfriend
I spot the baker
leading his horse-drawn wagon

along by the lower flats
and the horse has a nosebag
and is eating indifferently
to it all

what time does the film start?
she asks
9am
I say

she's excited
and I note her hair
needs brushing
but say nothing

I just say
got any money?
she nods her head
yes Mum gave me 9d

and says get a lolly
but is that enough Benny?
is it?
sure it is

I say
but if not
I'll buy it
I add

seeing her smile
and feeling glad.