The Row

I just wanted to express how people on 'death row' might feel through a short poem.

Clocks tick by.

Memories shattered

Bodies broken

Minds erased

Souls replaced

Years go by

sitting in a row

out of line

waiting for the end

Knives.

Chairs.

Bullets.

Ropes.

Gas.

Needles.

To repay a crime

by committing one

As if the end

hurts worse

than the beginning.

Clocks tick by.

We're not the men

we once 

were thought 

to be

Darkness

burning the faces

one by one

killing what's left

Victory?

Happiness?

Repaid?

Closure?

Legacy?

or

Revenge.

If I could repay

the blood they shed

my life

would only

be worth half

If I could repay

the life they lost,

aren't we 

all born

the same?

Clocks tick by.

Years go by

sitting in a row

out of line

waiting for the end.

Author's Note

I wrote this kind of quickly, so I didn't look over it a lot. I just felt like this would be a good subject to express to. Please tell me what you think!

Reviews

[EloisaWrites]

I can feel the urgency and the pace of this write. Even though you didn't look over it that much, I love the way you have expressed your thoughts. It's already good for me. :)

[RealistMe]

I like this poem because it's dark and makes people think. I think certain parts of the poem can be condensed into 1 or 2 lines. I understand why the words are in fragments and read as a list. Although, I think there really shouldn't be as many stanzas. I would also suggest, that instead of saying "Clock ticks by," you should change it to "The clock ticks" because it sounds better. Or you could say, "The time goes by" or "The time passes."

[TheLoneWriter]

Thank you for taking the time to write a review! Honestly, I wrote this really fast with very few editing, but I will definitely look over it when I get the chance! I think you are right with both issues, thanks for letting me know!

[RealistMe]

You're welcome. I'm glad to be of some help! :)