Cemetery Sadness

Driving through the cemetery on the lake shore does me no good

Yet here I am 

Seated in my car on a cold January’s day 

Windows down slightly 

Whatever must come in 

Can also leave if pleased 

I know no one here 

And though I see the pity 

In people’s eyes as they walk past 

I cannot keep from crying 

Ugly childlike sobs 

From the deepest pits of my belly 

Uncomfortable 

Uncontrollable 

Lost I am 

And I know not all that wander 

Are lost 

But I’m not wandering 

Because I know where I am going 

Always have a destination 

The cemetery on the lake shore 

Socially acceptable to cry in public in the name of grief 

So I grieve daily 

Hourly 

No one around to invalidate my pain 

No one to ruse me out of bed 

Push me out the door 

Just me and the stones 

With the carved names 

Of people I will never know 

Long forgotten 

No roses to decay 

Grass browning around their plot 

Cemeteries are for the living 

Because the dead have long moved on 

And I fear that I will stay here forever 

Because I can’t possibly allow myself to stray from what I know 

Who I know 

And who I don’t 

I fear that if I leave the place in which my grief is protected 

Someone will shatter it 

Leave me vulnerable to more pain 

It’s always good to get ahead of the game 

And I guess the game is life 

I’m not sure how to win 

I haven’t read the rules 

But it’s not very fun 

And I know that I’m losing 

Losing everyone I love 

And everything I cared for 

Just to sit lonely in a grave 

Gravely distressed 

With no one I know 

And no one I have loved 

Because I can’t seem to find the exit 

Or maybe I just keep missing it 

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand the poem dear poet. My mother passed on 29 July. Now I am the oldest in my family. When we lose our mentors, our friend. Part of our heart is lost.
"And I know that I’m losing
Losing everyone I love
And everything I cared for
Just to sit lonely in a grave
Gravely distressed "
The above lines. Solid and true and thank you for sharing the amazing words and your thoughts.
Coyote

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

A very strong poem
I don’t go to cemeteries now much at all but I was taken a few times a month as a child to tend family graves
I wish you well with your writing
It’s very good 😌

[The Things She Noted]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate it:)

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

That’s a pleasure

[Unspoken poet]

This is quite an emotional read, very well written

[The Things She Noted]

Thank you so much! :)