"Seen"

Inspired by Ed Hart's piece "terra cognito" http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/edhart7/683387/

 

While God was creating beauty,

He plucked a rib from Adam's chest,

and conceived the beating heart of Eve.

Women inherit this from their mother,

and bless us mere men with its passion,

making everything brighter

in eyes that hold dear the sight

of love found in the gaze of a women.

It makes me long

to be seen...

 

2011 © T.G. Hopkins III

Reviews

[Quinn Blackburn]

oh wow, splendid wordcrafting! that closing thought is one that people can relate to universally, longing to be seen. In fact, some of us get lost in the masks we wear for others, and forget who we are! Every line here has impact for me, a wonderful work!

[Sunflower/Sara Kendrick]

Tommy, Enjoyed reading your thoughts about women..The women in your life are blessed to have a man who appreciates the female without vulgarity..Thanks for your comments on my work..I appreciate the time spent reading ...Sunflower

[MuSe Ampoule]

Tender answer to Ed's smashing piece...I thought you kept with the flow of his work, the quick pace and lovely beat. Great short piece to follow up that marathon writing! ; )

[Jūdan FyreHeart]

Very sweet and tender =D The lingering hope and sadness bring it to a soft close.